My Journal -- December 2008

 December 1, 2008

 

I swept in the buladan before I took in hot drink. I was in the mood of sun-drying palay today. I must do this so that it would not be a hassle for me when I ask Papay Benson for my tuition on Thursday.

 

Daba texted me at 9 am, asking when the filing for LET would be. I was forced to buy load, so that I could reply to her.

 

At past eleven, Celoy helped us in re-sacking palay. He thought the rain would fall any time. It was a favorable idea for me. I could at least have rest.

 

It did not rain the whole day, but I was thankful though I have never had a chance to nap due to the heat. I instead watched tv.

 

Before 4, Delon and Papay Benson had a fight over a certain hearsay/ the former was drunk. They were both cursing each other. The latter held an axe.

 

I was very nervous and scared. It was the very first time I saw them amok. I was shaking, but I still managed to tell it to Ate Quennie, who was writing in Bulasu.

 

That incident must be a lesson for Papay Benson. He must learn from it. He must stop from big mouthing.

 

 

 

 

December 2, 2008

 

I woke up at past seven. I had nothing to do. I heard that we were not going to sun-dry palay. I instead looked for something to be busy with. I read module 1.

 

At eleven, Pablo and I were directed to buy containers of gasoline and diesel because all the gas stations in Bulan were out of stock. It was one when we got home.

 

Later I found out that my cell phone’s battery was not charging. I was so sad even when I was in school. I charged it there, but it did not show a sign of life. Thus, I bought a new battery. However, I was again disappointed to know that it was not also charging. It means the mobile itself was the defective one, not the charger or batteries.

 

I was supposed to stay in the library, but I decided to go home early after the last period class so that I could fix my mobile phone. I could not imagine life without it. I hate being disconnected.

 

I slept hoping the next day my phone is already functioning normally.

 

 

 

December 3, 2008

 

Before I went downstairs, I tried to fix first my phone. It was still not charging. But I charged it. Then, I texted Mj about it, using Aileen’s phone. I told her not to text me on my number.

 

I facilitated the palay milling. It was past 12 when we got home.

 

After washing the dishes, I played games on the computer. It was 2:30 when I quit. That time, I began accepting the fact that I could not use my phone for a couple of days or weeks. But, if I could bear being phoneless, I would not spend on its repair.

 

I took a nap after playing computer games.

 

Papay Benson gave me P1,000 for my tuition fee. I paid half of it, so I could have a permit for the exam morrow. I saved P500 for my miscellaneous expenses on Christmas break. I knew it would not be a big deal to my uncle’s budget. Besides, it’s supposed to be the discount I earned.

 

I did not go home yet at 7:30 pm. I reviewed TS 2 a bit. I wanted to get a perfect score again.

 

 

 

 

December 4, 2008

 

I reviewed TS 2 and Prof Ed 14 at the very early tome of the day. I have not gone downstairs yet. However, I had to do so because of the need to pee. I pursued it at Aileen’s house, while the music was in the background. I did not know if it was effective.

 

I had to stop reviewing time after time because it was maddening to memorize multifarious lessons. I had to watch tv and walk around.

 

After the first exam, Ate Che invited us to their house. Today is her niece’s birthday. We were so happy and full.

 

In the library, we all keep on laughing over funny things that we said, we noticed, and we acted. They are so kalog. We did not have any dull moments. I could not focus on reviewing. But it was okay.

 

Then, the second and last exam for today had been so easy for me. I was the second one to submit my test paper. I was just disappointed to know that I have two absolute mistakes in objective type. But it was alright. At least, I found it easy ang made it quickly.

 

I went to Amy’s house right after I submitted my paper. However, she was not there. According to her big sister, she’s going to sleep over there. I just waited for less than ten minutes there. Alas.

 

At six-thirty, I got home.

 

After dishwashing, I read a bit, as a sort of review.

 

 

 

December 5, 2008

 

While drinking coffee, I was reviewing. I was also listening to music since I was doing it at Aileen’s house.

 

At nine, I cooked our lunch. Later, I helped Ate Ningning in packing the rice, that they would bring to Binangonan, Rizal.

 

At ten, I diversified myself in reading a mystery book that I borrowed last Tuesday. It’s the book by Agatha Christie, entitled “And Then There were None.” It’s interesting, but I did not want to indulge in it because it might affect my memorization.

 

I took a nap after Mama Leling, Ate Ningning, Eking, and Charity left for Manila.

 

At 4 pm, I was already dressed for school. And there, I tried to relax. I did not review anymore. I just read magazine ang newspapers.

 

Our Prof Ed 10 exam had been so easy for me. I was the first one to submit the test paper. Chicken feed!

 

Our Prof Ed 5 was not quite easy, but I finished it so quickly. I was also the first to pass the test paper.

 

I took notes after the examination. My right thumb was numb after one hour of writing. Good thing, I have no more dishes to be washed.

 

It was 10 pm when I slept. I watched ‘Eva Fonda’ first.

 

 

 

December 6, 2008

 

Since it was a rainy day, I had no work outside except to do some errands.

 

After breakfast I settled on the sofa and tries to concentrate in watching American film on tv, but I had to quit it due to a need to do kitchen work.

 

I prepared the langka. I dish washed. I cooked rice and presto! I was free again.

 

Upstairs, I pursued perusal of the mystery book. I found myself attached to it. It has resemblance to ‘Big Brother.’ The only difference is that in Big Borther House, there is elimination or eviction. In the book of Agatha Christie, there is death—one by one, unknown death of ten guests. It’s interesting!

 

I took a nap when my eyes got tired of reading. At 3:30. I was doing it again until five. It was when I cooked rice.

 

Since there was a low pressure, the electric current was cut by the provider. I could not help but finish reading through the smoky light of a kerosene lamp. I read the epilogue of ‘And Then There Were None.’ I was fully satisfied with its ending. It’s great! It 9inspired me to write again and to pursue writing my novel, “Dumb Found’ and to rewrite and remake my script ‘Alter Ego,’ which was wonderfully deliberated by me, I mean composed or put into print. I knew its idea and concept is unique. And I’m proud that I have made such a piece. Alas, it was not in my hands now. Though, Nieva confided that they get the stuff in our baul, a wooden chest in Polot, where I left all my precious things such as books, magazines, notebooks, collections of coins, paint brushes, stamps, etc., I knew I would be hard for me to recover them.

 

It was so cold, but I could not sleep yet. Thus, I spent hours in planning the plot of ‘Dum Found.’ I was as if fantasizing. I could feel that I was in an island, where Pepe, Gabby, the special education teacher, and the pilot were there.

 

 

 

December 7, 2008

 

I woke up early to do household chores, that are usually done by Ate Ningning or Mama Leling. I fried rice. I took breakfast and dish washed. I also washed the cook wares. Then, I mopped the floor.

 

Afterwards, I borrowed module 3 from Ate Quennie and read it upstairs. I did not summarize it because I had to cook.

 

After lunch, I re-read the five chapters of my novel, Dumb Found. I took a nap in the middle of it. I loved it. I could now proudly say that I’m a novelist.

 

I have a perspective on how to finish the novel. But I am not yet ready to write it because I must prioritize my studies and the gathering of reviewers.

 

At five, I cooked rice.

 

The electric current was in service again at 5:30. I thanked God for I could read and write. Later, Jasleen saw the reading materials that I was reading. She asked me to translate it to her so that she could fully comprehend. She enjoyed it, especially “The Wish.”

 

Before and while taking supper, Ate Quennie and I talked about Four-Pronged Approach and surprise visit of a DepEd people to observe. I had shared with her an anecdote about ‘Thinked,’ that was used by a teacher when he/she was on the verge of nervousness and confusion due to an observation. It was related to us by Ma’am Enolva. I hoped I had given her a warning or hint that she must always be equipped and ready. A lesson plan is indeed a must.

 

 

 

 

December 8, 2008

 

Jasleen woke me at 8 am. She asked me to read her stories. Some of the stories she chose were the ones that we had already read last night.

 

At nine, I was doing laundry. I expedited it before the electric current is cut again, since I would dry them in the machine.

 

I wanted, as always, to go to school today, however Nonoy told me that he inquired in RGCC. I felt sad.

 

At past 4, I bought a birthday card for Auntie Vangie.

 

At five, I cooked rice. Later, I assisted Aileen in cooking our viand.

 

At 7:45 pm, I wrote this message to the card:

 

December 16, 2008

Auntie Vangie,

 

A person with kind heart

    Deserves a healthy life.

A person with big hand

    Deserves a prosperous life.

Someone like you

    Must receive all the best wishes---

    A wisher can give.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

 

 

I slept at 10:30 because I watched tv, alone.

 

In the middle of the night, I lost one tooth in my dream. I remembered the superstition that if it is your dream, you might lose a loved one. I immediately asked God not to make it happens. I’m not ready to accept it. I then asked pardon for my sins ang shortcomings.

 

 

 

December 9, 2008

 

The sun shone early; thus, I rose early. I swept in the yards as I got up. I followed the taking of breakfast and dishwashing.

 

I was still alarmed by my dream. I craved for a message coming from Mj. I wanted to make sure they were fine.

 

Before I cooked our viand, I sent the birthday card through the post office.

 

I was so sad this afternoon because Papay Benson did not give me allowance. I did everything for him to notice me, but I failed. It seemed that he really intended not to give me. Yet, I still went to school.

 

I got the highest score in TS 2. I got the perfect score.

 

Vacant period. I bonded with my close co-unit earners.

 

At seven, after Prof Ed 14, I wrote in the library.

 

I missed my kids so much. I hoped they were well.

 

 

 

December 10, 2008

 

At six, I was already doing household chores. Cooking rice and washing cook wares. Mopping. Later I ran errands, but oh, we had no breakfast at all. At 9 am, my stomach was so empty.

 

I cooked tortang talong early so that I could eat brunch. It was 10:20 am.

 

At 12 noon, I used the computer in Aileen’s house. I had to quit it when the brownout occurred. It returned after a few minutes.

 

While taking care of Skye, I was watching tv. This was the only thing I could indulge in since I did not like reading William Shakespeare’s Othello, that I borrowed from the library yesterday. I found it hard to comprehend. The language used was very archaic like thee, thine, thou, hast, doth, didst, etc.

 

I took a nap at past 3 and at past 4, I was already in school. I borrowed a book from the library and started reading it. I found it interesting and value laden. Robert Fulghum, the author of ‘All I Really Need to Know I learned in Kindergarten’ made me aware of the quintessence of the nursery rhyme, ‘Eensy-Weensy Spider’ when he expounded it there.

 

Ma’am Golloso was absent, so as Ma’am Enolva thus I had a bonding moment with Ate Celine. Ate Che, Ate Salve, Sha, and Florenel. We giggled about sex styles and other stuff. Ate Celine confided in us her verbal quarrel with her husband. I gave her some words of advice.

 

Later I conversed with Christian G. He told me about his work.

 

After dinner, I did homework. It was past 10 when I went upstairs.

 

 

 

December 11, 2008

 

I got up early so that I could do chores. I heard Mama Leling would arrive today. Thus, I swept while cooking rice. I washed the cook wares. I fixed the trash.

 

Reading, I was after all of these.

 

At past 9, I went to a cell phone repair shop and let the technician fix my phone and Kuya Bambi’s. Unfortunately, they were not fixed up. My phone’s LCD must be replaced. But I could not afford it now. I do not have P700 yet.

 

When I got home. Mama Leling, Eking, and Cha were already there. Aileen was cooking. Thus, I helped her. I also kept out the mess.

 

I read and took a nap before I prepared for school. I read again in the library and in the classroom.

 

After Ma’am Girado’s period, Tina, Ate Che, Ate Salve, Florenel, and I went to Ate Salve’s house to have merienda. After the snacks, we contributed for the liquor. I gave P60 in all for two lapad. But it was worth it. I was so happy. We were so happy.

 

I texted Mj using Tina’s cell phone. She told me that Mama wanted me soon because the latter needs company for her eye operation. I did not commit. But I wanted to leave Bulan as soon as possible.

 

I was drunk. My vision was in trouble, but I could manage myself.

 

I got home at the regular hour; a student must be home. Nobody suspected that I was drunk, so Mj. However, I had no chance to stay downstairs for a long hour.

 

 

 

 

December 12, 2008

 

At one o’ clock in the morning, I got up to pee. My head was aching. My vision was rotating. I felt nausea, but I knew I was sober. I lay down immediately before I could throw up. However, it made me sleepless. I thought of going to Antipolo City morrow. I wanted to accompany Mama in her eye operation and to join the first ever alumni reunion of ANHS Batch ’98, though I was not registered. I tried to watch tv at 2;30 am and read the book of Kevin Hankes ‘Words of Stone,’ that I borrowed yesterday.

 

I had only a few hours’ sleep. It was seven when I rose. Later I texted Jano ang Flor asking when Mama’s operation would be. I also texted Mj and some of my friends, announcing that I am not able to text them because I have no cell phone.

 

Mj replied at past 9. I told her that I wanted to leave Bulan now, but I would prefer to hitch hike in Kuya Jape’s truck, so that I could save money.

 

Jano replied, too. He said ‘Wla p ng budget, e. Mkakautang k b kay P.Benson? Magpapabinyag p nga.”

 

I did not reply.

 

I waited for Mj’s reply, while reading. After lunch there was still no text from her. Until I decided to take a nap in Aileen’s house. It was past 3 when I got up, returning the mobile to her. Later, I read Mj’s replies. She told me that Courtney has accidentally thrusted Mama’s eye.

 

This was the dream I’ve dreamt of last December 8 or it was already 9.

 

It did not disappoint me that I could not join the alumni homecoming, however I missed my kids so terribly. As the days come nearer and nearer, it becomes longer and longer. I was so anxious to be with them. In fact, I was already packed and kept my stuff. I also had two apples for them. I did not nibble them yesterday, when Mama Leling gave them to me.

 

At past 5, a message from Mj arrived. She said, ‘Pksbi n lng ky Poroy n kelngan n nya uwi kc sya lng hntay Mama nya pra maoperahan. D n dw kc nkakaaninag. Iyak ng iyak. Pkisabi n lng. Thnks!”

 

It saddened me so much. Then, I decided to leave tomorrow.

 

At six, I went to Ate Salve’s house to give something about RGCC. Then, I went to Amy’s house. I told her about my trip morrow. Then, she told me that she has an acquaintance that might help me in my writing career. I left at 7:45 pm.

 

At 8, Mama phoned me. She and Flor were in Rancho. She needed me at the soonest time. Thus, I must leave tomorrow.

 

At 10:30, I wrote a message on a Christmas card. It goes like this:

 

Ma’am Girado,

 

I sincerely hope

You have a pleasant Christmas

With your family

With your loved ones

 

I truthfully wish you

GOOD HEALTH

AND PRSOPERITY!

 

SEASON GREETINGS!

 

I will bring it to Ate Che tomorrow.

 

 

 

December 13, 2008

 

At six, I was already wide-awake. Excitedly to leave, I was. I did some packing of stuff. Nobody knew that I was about to leave today.

 

At eight, I bought a bracelet in Tribal’ as requested by Taiwan and sandals for his daughter and wife. When I got home, it was when Mama Leling had learned about my leaving. I told her that I borrowed money from my classmate.

 

I was not hoping for Papay Benson to give me. He was not in a good mood because I knew he has no money, as well. But Aileen told it to him early at 10 am, which just hurt me. He said, ‘Di man si poroy an operahan. Yadi na didi mapamanila pa.” I slightly blamed Aileen for telling it early.

 

After helping in shredding the coconuts, I went to Ate Che’s house to fetch the P200 I owed and to give her the Christmas card for Ma’am Girado. I instructed her, too.

 

Jay-R texted me, asking when I would leave Bulan. I also learned that he was going to Bulan on December 23. He stopped texting after joking about pili as pasalubong.

 

At one o’ clock, I was already set to leave. I bade adieu to Papay Benson, who immediately asked if I do have money. He said, “Hulat-hulata si Aileen.”

 

Aileen was on the delivery of rice.

 

I went to the street pretending I was waiting for a tricycle. I, of course, wanted and needed money. I then anticipated her. Waiting hurts me. It was when I overheard my uncle said “Si Poroy ngani, abonaran man. Mapamanila war kwarta.”

 

I decided to leave. However, Aileen arrived before the tricycle approached.

 

I was blessed with P1,000. I thanked God.

 

The bus left the terminal at past 1:30 pm. However, it picked up several passengers in Immaculate, who had so much baggage and who were so noisy. It annoyed me and it gave me a feeling of nausea.

 

I asked God not to let me vomit, since they were almost throwing up. It was past six when the nausea was gone.

 

I did not eat dinner. I just ate balut.

 

 

 

December 14, 2008

 

At four-thirty, I reached Espinosa’s home. Nanay opened the door for me. Mama was still asleep, so was Mj and my kids. I woke up Mj and served me coffee. Hanna embraced me and slept beside me when she noticed my presence.

 

It was seven when we all got up. It was the time when I saw Mama’s eyes. She really could not see me. I pity her. I almost cry, especially when she related to me the doctor’s words yesterday in her checkup. She might permanently lose her vision, which was merely caused by a sharp thrust of a pointed edge of a junk food foil. Mama told me the real scene of the accident. It was actually Flor’s fault, not Courtney’s.

 

I have noticed how Mj helped and served Mama. She fed her. She got everything Mama’s needs. She facilitated the dropping of sterile ophthalmic solution on her eye from time to time. Thus, I took over some of the services since it’s my responsibility.

 

Mama and I had a chance to converse when Mj left to market, since I gave her P600 to buy Mama’s needs such as prescribed dropping solution and our food. Hanna was with her. I took care of Zj, who was not afraid of me and often called me Papa.

 

I played with Zildjian and Hanna. My son was so at ease with my presence, unlike before. It gladdened me much. I was just a bit sad seeing Hanna, who has no appetite.

 

Seeing Mama in her pitiful condition made my heart bled. It was very sad to know she would celebrate Christmas blindly. However, I was thankful that she would recover her sight.

 

Gie, Jano, Flor, and Courtney arrived at 2:30 pm. They have seen Mama’s condition. Before they left, Gie gave P500 for Mama’s eye drops.

 

At past 7, I told Mama that we must go and stay in Bautista instead of staying here, since tomorrow Ilek and Nicole will arrive, not to mention Michelle’s presence. Space is a big deal. Nanay said we must stay.

 

Ate Che and I text-conversed. She regarded my mother. So, I related to her everything.

 

 

 

December 15, 2008

 

Caregiving Mama did not tire me. What exhausted me was the sight of disorder in Espinosa’s house. The children were so noisy. I was so bored even though I was with my mag-iina. We did not have a private moment.

 

The arrival of Ilek and Nicole gave me a slight uneasiness. It seemed the house became smaller and noisier. Mj had additional work.

 

I pursued bonding with my kids, especially with Zj, who was now closer to me. I kept on tickling and touching him. I also made him giggle.

 

At three pm, Taiwan and his mag-ina arrived. He had noticed my bodily improvement. “Tumataba ka, ah,” he said. He gave me P300 before they left at 4:30.

 

At five-thirty, Mama and I left Espinosa’s residence. I was supposed to bring Hanna with us, but I could not bear her since we had two bags. Mama could not see. I must lead her. I pity my daughter when she clangs to me, crying.

 

Mj was very sad that we left them. She texted me these:

1.      Ah ok. Sori kng mdyi ngttmpo aq knina. Bsta asikasuhin u n lng c Mama. Aus lng kmi. Wat nga pla plan u pgblik dun? Cno n mag-aalaga?

2.      Syempre bksyon u nga pro d k nmin mksma. Ang tgal q p namn hnintay 2. Pro aus lng pilit q nmn iniintindi. Ms klngan k n Mama.

In Gate 2, I left Mama near Jollibee, so that I could purchase her prescribed drug and some groceries.

 

I never thought Mama would be totally blind and I would be her leader. It was such a saddening truth. But I must do it sincerely. Now, it was the right time to pay Mama gratitude. She needed me now. I’m the only available one to give her care. However, it is only good for 3 weeks or until January 2, 2008, since I must go back to Bulan on or before the 5^th of the new year.

 

Jano and Gie were not yet home when we arrived. Mama and I were eating when they did. I was a bit intimidated, but it was gone later, especially when I cooked our viand.

 

Before I finished cooking, Jano assigned a few tasks to me that I must undertake tomorrow since Courtney’s Baptismal and 1^st birthday is approaching. I’m always so willing to help.

 

 

 

December 16, 2008

 

I had to wake up early so that I could feed Mama, drop her eye with the solution, and accomplish the tasks assigned to me by Jano. I swept the dried leaves in the yard, I trimmed the carabao grass, and watered the plants. It was so cold outside, but I did them all very early—right after having a hot drink.

 

Later, I did household chores. Then, I joined Flor in videokeing.

 

After lunch, I watched DVD movie. First, I viewed ‘Jackass 2.5, then I watched ‘The Brothers Solomon.’ I loved them.

 

Mama was complaining from time to time about her being blind. She was crying to God. Thus, I let her feel that I’m not tired of caregiving her.

 

Before I slept, I prayed to God. I asked him to heal Mama’s eye. She’s not used to it. She would rather work or serve than to be served.

 

 

 

December 17, 2008

 

Ate Che texted me at 1:23 am. She said “Gud am! Tara simba tau. Aniwe hindi nging secret ung card n bnigay u kan Mam G. Kc tinawag kmi ng malakas at ask xa if nkalagay daw mga name natin… u”

 

It was okay. I just hoped it gave happiness to Ma’am Girado.

 

Mama woke me up by calling my name at 5:30 because Jano and Gie were about to leave, and Flor was not yet home. I must take care of Courtney. Immediately I rose and treated Mama her hot milk and bread. I started hourly dropping later.

 

At six, I babysit Courtney. Mama was forced to do, as well due to Flor’s absence. Courtney’ now a bit comfortable with me.

 

At nine, I watched film on DVD. It was ‘Superbads.’

 

At eleven, I texted Auntie Emole and Auntie Vangie as requested by Mama. I said “Gud day po, Auntie! C Froilan po 2. Hmhingi po c Mma ng prayer. 2tally blind po cia now at mdyo iknwwla n nia ng pag-asa. Imbes n lumnaw ung paningin dhil s pnptak n gmot, lalo png lumlbo. Mskit rw po. Salamat!”

 

Auntie Vangie replied abruptly. She asked about it.

 

After lunch, I watched movie again, which was ‘Moving McAllister.’ I had to take a nap after watching half of it, while watching the time for Mama’s drop.

 

At four, I played ‘I Now Pronounce You, Chuck and Larry’ and stopped watching it at 5 pm so that I could do household chores.

 

At seven, Auntie Emole replied, though very late. She also asked and suggested to bring back Mama to the doctor. She only made two replies. I thanked her.

 

Gie suggested that Mama must be checked up again by another ophthalmologist for a second opinion. Mama has, beforehand, decided that’s he would go back to the doctor on Monday. However, Gie wanted it tomorrow. Thus, Mama agreed. We would go to San Juan Medical Center, where Dr. Enriquez, who operated her cataract is.

 

 

 

December 18, 2008

 

At five, Mama woke me up for her eye drops. It was so cold when I rose, thus I went back to sleep after it and after Mama declined to prepare to leave early.

 

At six, we prepared ourselves. I helped Mama.

 

Gie handed me down our budget for the checkup. It’s P1,100.

 

At past eight, we left Bautista.

 

I was like an ROTC commander to Mama. I would say ‘Hakbang pababa!’ or ‘Hakbang pataas!’ I was so careful in leading her. I thought it was harder than driving a car. But I understood. For Mama’s situation, it was also very hard for her to walk, to go upstairs o downstairs, and to cross the street blindly.

 

At 10:30, we reached San Juan Medical Center. Unfortunately, there was no doctor who could check Mama up. She, then decided to go to a center where Lola Salud and Lolo Candoy’s eyes were operated. We phoned Gie and she agreed.

 

At one, we were in Araneta Avenue, where Richstone Surgicare Center is located. But, then again, ophthalmologist was scheduled every Tuesday. Wew! We were so tired and hungry. We were almost giving up.

 

I texted Auntie Vangie and asked her if she knew another ophthalmologist, but she said she hasn’t.

 

Then I texted and notified Gie about it, asking where Hospital ng Maynila was, that she recommended. We waited too long for her reply until past two. I calculated that we might fall short of time in searching for the hospital.

 

Mama and I decided to go to Gie’s office, so that she would believe that we were been in Araneta Avenue.

 

We bought and ate rice and pork as our late lunch.

 

After eating, I was feeling nausea and vomiting. I also wanted to lie down and sleep. It was 4 pm when we left the company, with Gie. She parted way in LRT-Santolan.

 

Ate Donna rode on the same FX, where we were riding on. She and I conversed since Mama was napping. It had been a long time since we last talk.

 

Before she rode off, she gave us P200 for our fare tomorrow. I thanked her. She had also offered ne help whenever Mama had to undergo cornea transplant and had to ask help in PCSO.

 

At seven, we got home. I was very exhausted. My head was so painful, but it was gone after I drank hot coffee.

 

 

 

December 19, 2008

 

After giving Mama her two eye drops, I hitched hike to Jano’s motorcycle up to Gate 2. I commuted form there to rancho. I fetched Hanna, then we went to Meralco-Masinag. There, I inquired if we had any amount to be refunded. Unfortunately, there was nothing to claim. It was okay!

 

In Gate 2, I bought apples and toy for Hanna. We reached home at eleven. I immediately cooked viand.

 

After lunch, we all took a nap. I however had to wake up after one hour because of eye dropping task. Thus, I watched ‘Keeping Mum.’ Jano opined to change it to child-friendly one, so I watched Shrek 3.

 

At five, I swept outside. Hanna helped me a little bit.

 

Tiya Letty, Anna, and Bebeng arrived at 9 am.

 

Amy and I had a nice conversation. I told her about Mama. She said “Tma ka, kya u un. Bsta mgpray k lng pirmi, Froi. Mhatg man aq s imo maski siyo lng na dnon, mski pngbakal san bulong n Ma2 u. Kpag yadi n ugang kamo. Cnsya n Froi ha.”

 

I told her that I was touched, and I thanked her in advance.

 

Ate Che and I also conversed about family thing. I was so sleepy, thus I quitted replying. It was past ten o’ clock.

 

 

 

December 20, 2008

 

After feeding Hanna, I started sweeping in the front yard. It was 7:00 am. I stopped at 9:30 to take a rest. Later, I took a bath. I also did household chores.

 

While Hanna was sleeping, I boiled water for slaughtering pigs.

 

At past three, I was commanded by Gie to decorate the buffet area with crepe papers. I accomplished it immediately.

 

Then, preparation started. I helped in chopping the onions and peeling vegetables. I was also the one who chopped the pork for lumpia since it was already eight. It would not be ground in the market.

 

At ten, I was done. I started sleeping. I was supposed to help with rolling lumpia, but I preferred not to.

 

 

 

December 21, 2008

 

I fed Hanna first before I faced sweeping and other tasks. I was so occupied—from decoration to kitchen work.

 

They rented karaoke machine; thus, I sang occasionally, especially when Jano and Gie left to the church for Courtney’s baptismal.

 

I waited for the tables and chairs to be delivered and set them up. Jano told me beforehand that I would not help with cooking. I just fried lumpia.

 

Mj arrived at past 10.

 

Dishwashing was being accomplished by a hired dishwasher. All I just did was to collect the used plates and maintain cleanliness and orderliness.

 

Auntie Vangie did not arrive because Vonvon arrived all the way from China. Renior approached me at past six. According to Auntie, she wanted to give Mama money. She was asking if I do have a bank account or Mj, but we do not have.

 

Renoir said that he would tell her mother. At least, he had seen Mama on her condition.

 

I did not join in drinking and karaokeing. I instead stayed near my mag-iina. This was a rare opportunity for us since I have to stay here for Mama and they have to go home tomorrow.

 

 

 

December 22, 2008

 

At six am, I got up and immediately picked up the clutter around the house. I also gathered the used dishes. Afterwards, I joined in karaokeing. I did not cleanse the huge cook wares like I did on Gie-Jano nuptial. I just enjoyed the last hours of the karaoke machine. I also bonded with my mag-iina.

 

At eleven, we (me and my mag-iina, Mama, Jano and his mag-iina, Taiwan and his mag-iina, Tiya Letty, Anna, ang Bebeng) left Bautista, riding on the Anfra. Jano and Gie would go to Pasig. Mama would have a checkup there.

 

It was past 12 when we reached the clinic. We waited for Mama’s turn. After one hour, she was checked up. The ophthalmologist said that Mama’s eye was now a little bit better than 10 days ago. However, she had to continue her eye drops until the wound healed. We were scheduled to go back on January 6.

 

Before we left Bayan, we dropped by Rancho to give the milk and diapers to my kids. I also got the pants that Mj has gotten from Tito Jay’s package.

 

I pity my kids. They were crying when we left them.

 

We were home at 3 pm. However, Flor was not there. The doors were closed. We waited until 4 pm or until I decided to break the padlock.

 

Later, after a late lunch, I did laundry of our clothes (Mama’s and mine). Flor arrived at 4:30. She tried to console me.

 

At past six, I cleaned up the stuff under Mama’s wooden bed. I reorganized them and gathered my stuff.

 

 

 

December 23, 2008

 

After feeding Mama at past 8, Flor irked me. She declined to wash the dishes and tried to pass it to me, which I strongly disagreed with. Instead, I swept in the yard.

 

At nine-thirty, it came to my senses that Christmas day is just around the corner. It saddened me because I did not know if I could take out my mag-iina for a family get together this holiday. I did not even have wrapped gifts for them.

 

I was watching DVD when the couple arrived. I had to stop it. Later I took a nap. I stayed in the room until 5:50 pm.

 

Jano cooked the viand. I just cooked rice.

 

I did some cleaning in the room and art things were also undertaken.

 

Jano played a DVD movie. It was ‘Sweeney Todd.’ I watched merely its half. I slept at 10 pm.

 

 

 

December 24, 2008

 

At seven, Jano told me to fetch my mag-iina in their house. He gave me P100. I left after a while. I was glad that we could be together this Christmas. We would have privacy in his own house since they were going to Lucena City today.

 

At nine, we left Rancho. I bought fruits, sliced bread, and others in Gate 2. It was 10 when we reached home. They were still home at eleven, then left for Lucena City. I was so happy for their departure. I knew Mj’s glad, as well.

 

I was greeted by my friends. I greeted them, too. Even those who did not.

 

 

 

 

December 25, 2008

 

During Christmas eve, we were all asleep. I was supposed to get up, but I was too sleepy to do so. Thus, I opted to snooze until morning. Mama just woke me up very early because she was so hungry.

 

I karaoke after lunch. Then, we altogether took a nap.

 

At 3, Zildjian and I went to veterans. We bought milk and bread. After merienda, we watched ‘Ice Age 2: The Meltdown.’

 

I still could not contact Efear. I was calling his Sun number, but it was always disconnected.

 

Today is one of my happiest days. I was with my kids. Thus, I always found a few seconds hugging and kissing them, while Mj… hmm. She was still craving my sweetness.

 

 

 

December 26, 2008

 

I was awakened by Mama’s cry. I instead pity her on that condition. Her head was aching. She could not sleep. She asked the Lord to take her. I just showed her I care, and I am willing to give care. I wished I could not fail her expectation of me.

 

I was sleepless, but I had to stay awake because from time to time, Mama needed me. I am her eyes and hands.

 

Jano texted me that they were going home today. Thus, I watched movies on DVD. Hanna joined me in viewing the animated film ‘Tarzan’ and ‘Finding Nemo.’ She enjoyed the latter.

 

Being failed to contact Efear annoyed me so much. I spent so much time dialing but it was just a failure. I texted his two numbers, but then we did not have a chance to converse. I quit it at 9:30. It was when the couple arrived.

 

Their arrival was not favorable to me. I did not know why. But the truth is I did not like their presence.

 

 

 

December 27, 2008

 

I had to do the eye dropping task even in the wee time because Mama’s eye would be painful if the hourly drop had not given. The result was I was sleepless.

 

At 9 am, I pushed Mj to leave since the couple was already home. She prepared immediately. However, she frowned when Mama did not permit me to go with them. It saddened me a lot. I did not want to feel any relative feelings toward Mama, but I must be understood by Mj.

 

At past 10, I was doing laundry. I was so sad, yet I served Mama and treated her nicely. She did not know how I felt. I did not want her to know anymore. I was here in Antipolo for her, not to mention the obligations and responsibilities I have for my kids.

 

At two, I was done washing. I took a rest beside Mama. I however did not forget the dropping.

 

Nonoy texted me at 5 pm. He was in Cogeo. He seemed to want to meet me, but I implied that I could not leave home because of Mama.

 

At 8, Mj texted me about the Anfra, that Tatay’s friend wanted to see and buy. I replied, ‘Ask q bukas.’

 

Now I knew they reached home safely.

 

I also hoped we would earn money in this deal.

 

At 8:30, I watched ‘1408,’ a horror film. I loved it!

 

 

 

 

December 28, 2008

 

Sweeping was done by me after drinking coffee. Afterwards, I started to feel bored. Jano and Gie’s presence might be the cause of it. If they were out to work, I would have been enjoying the day.

 

I browsed two magazines before I cooked lunch.

 

Jano asked for my help at past 12. He cut the branches of the avocado tree near the house. I cleared out the branches and leaves. It was two-thirty when I entered the house to rest. I watched tv for one hour and later I took a nap.

 

At past eight, Jano and I watched ‘Transformers,’ not the animated film, huh. It was a great film—the robots seem real. I remember the toy I bought in Jollibee for Zildjian. It was Bumblebee. It’s so happened that he’s the one who has the longest exposure among the autoboots because he’s the guardian of Sam Witwicky, the main human character in the movie. I loved it!

 

 

 

 

December 29, 2008

 

After sweeping, Jano commanded ne to buy him Ventolin inhaler in Gate 2. It was 8 m. Gie gave me a list to buy as well. I was home at 9 o’ clock.

 

At nine-thirty, I looked for ube. I have just found tiny crops.

 

At ten, I texted Ate Che and Sharon. The latter’s daughter was in the hospital, so I gave her words of comfort.

 

I finished cooking at past eleven. I then read magazines before and after I ate lunch. Later I took a catnap.

 

At past 5:30, Mj texted me. She told me that she bought me slippers, but she did not know if they fit me. I replied though I was preparing for our dinner. She also stated the items she bought for Hanna and Zildjian and the amount they received from Lola, Lolo, Michael, and Me-Ann.

 

Since she purchased slippers, clothes, and cough syrup, she already has no money, so she said, “Bka d kmi mkpunta ng kids jan, wla n aq pera e.”

 

I said, “Bka jan aq magNew Year.” I reasoned out, but I told her that I was not sure. Mama did not know my plan yet.

 

We watched ‘American Gangsters’ at past 8. I liked the story; however, I was visited by terrible drowsiness. Thus, I decided not to finish watching it. It was 10 pm.

 

 

 

December 30, 2008

 

After having coffee and mayo sandwich, I did sweeping in the yard. I also watered the plants. And before I took a rest, I buried the garbage in the cliff, which was composed of plastics, diapers, and other trash. It caused me a light chest pain.

 

At eleven, I wrote a draft of message for Mj. It goes like this:

            The old year has gone so fast that we could not even remember how many times we spent time altogether. But though it was, I am glad we are still holding on together despite all the odds.

 

            I want to wish you more patience and a healthy body to bear the toughness of rearing our children.

 

            This year, I hope we can have our own settlement where we could live permanently.

 

            Happy New Year to you!

 

At past one, I did some reorganizing. I was preparing my stuff so that I would not forget or leave them here when I go back to Bulan.

 

Mama permitted me to spend New Year’s Eve in Rancho. She could understand me.

 

I did cooking and dishwashing. Before I slept, I played ‘Link 5’ on my cell phone.

 

 

 

December 31, 2008

 

They all wanted me to fetch my family, but I never told them yet my plan of spending the eve at my in-laws’ house. Instead, I joked that we would go to Hong Kong tonight. Jano and Gie had no comments when Mama told them at past 10.

 

After lunch, I stayed under my blanket. Before I fell asleep, Mama advised me to be forgiving so that I could move on. She told me that Tito Boy’s apologetic. However, I did not like the idea of mingling with them. If only I would do it plastically ‘A cracked drinking glass will never be sealed. It can be used but it is risky.” This is my point of view.

 

Mama changed her mind. She tried to convince me to stay. However, I was deep-rooted in my decision. I want to be with my kids and wife.

 

She did not disagree strongly, so I was blessed when I left at eight.

 

I greeted them Happy New Year, like what I did in the text.

 

At 6:30, Auntie Vangie greeted me ‘Happy New Year!’ Later, after I replied, she asked me if I could go to Bodino on Saturday because she has something to give. I said yes. And I immediately thought that they would not be here tomorrow like they always do during New Year’s first day.

 

Mama was sad a bit, but I knew Auntie Vangie would give her a bigger amount this time.

 

Auntie Leny replied to my greetings. Later I told her about Mama’s condition. I have also learned about Lolo Aton’s.

 

I reached my in-laws’ house at past 9 pm. I brought grapes. Good thing, they did not have grapes on the table. It was at the right time.

 

My kids were so happy in my presence. So, I was! I thought the house was jam-packed, but it was Ilke and Nicole who were there. Thus, we were freer to move. It added to my gladness.

 

Hanna did not sleep. She was also waiting for New Year’s Eve.