My Journal -- January and February 2007

January 1, 2007

The fireworks started to be heard noise were made here and there HAPPY NEW YEAR! It was greetings shout of everyone.

Jano gave us "lusis." He also lit kwitis."

It's now a New Year. It's a YEAR OF THE PIGS!

I was happy inside you couldn't see it outside. However, it was ruined by Mj. She shifted her mood. She never talks. I don't know why?

Thus, it affects me. My mood was turned into a misery. I then felt the same feeling the year I meet the new year.

When Jano gave us money for Colt 45, I partly accepted it. I don't want to drink but I have too.

Taiwan and I started the 'videokeing'. Later, Ate April arrives. She's sing-along with us. That time, that time Mj and was still sleeping. I sang "Because of You". I teasingly dedicated it for her, and I dared to try changing its lyrics.

Three. I was so sleepy. Thus, I lay my back and intend to close my eyes for a short time. If someone wakes me up, I will get up. However, no one wakes me up. Taiwan, I saw, was securing the T.V. set and component.

Seven, I got up. When I went outside, I saw the mess again. However, I couldn't sleep to clean thus I lie down again. However, I couldn't sleep already. So, at 7:45, I totally got up and started cleaning in and out the house.

Past 8, Mj and I took in our breakfast. She's still silent, as if I did something bad for her lately. I tried to be calm. I asked her nothing.

After breakfast I still come closed to her through Hanna. I reckon it's not me she was mad with/ at. But as 9, when I couldn't resist myself, I asked her what her problem was. She says nothing I repeated the question. She really did say nothing. Thus, I pushed her to pack up without thinking that today. Mama and Auntie Vangie would arrive.

I would rather them to leave than to see her like that. She's like a dunce. I don't know what bad spirit of New Year possessed her.

Then, I decided to separate with her. This was not the first time I made it. But this time I would be crueler to her. It's not my fault. I only wish I could make our lives happy and good. But, in an unknown little reason she would act like that.

I could understand her as a pregnant woman, but she must understand me or my family (if ever).

Ten, my 'mag-ina' left. I tried to sleep when I did, I went inside Flor's room. There I have fallen asleep till one.

Four, Auntie Vangie and Tito arrived. They were only two. Their children were not with them. Mama was with them too. She brought us "pasalubong"- fireworks and shirts. Taiwan and I and Flor (again) grab-all-we can! Were like a hungry scavenger.

Next thing happened was the coming of "Roberto family." Momoy and his 'mag-ina' visited, too. Then Carina and Tonton came in.

Bad thing is I must go to Gate 2 for my collection job. I left at past five.

I thought I could collection nothing but fortunately I have collected P200 from tent tenants. I made it for fifteen minutes.

I was home at six-thirty. I was surprised by Anabel and Gaga's presence. Anabel and I talked, just like before. I could still remember our pasts and friendships.

Mama handed me down P200 that was given by Auntie Vangie for my children. I thought I could relieve nothing, since I left for work. Mama is indeed thoughtful. She asked Auntie Vangie for me.

 

January 02, 2007

When Jano got up to prepare for his work, I was awakened. Mama was fully awake, too, she started her day. Seven, I got up to help her. She was cleaning the surrounding then I found myself cleaning-- general cleaning, huh! Mama inspired me to do so. Thus, Gie follows.

Mama told me that she's decided to work for Auntie Vangie as cook. I agreed.

Then at 12, Tito Sam came in. They're talking about something while I was keeping "not usable" clothes. I overheard next that Auntie Bee was coming here to ask for payment to this house. It has been a problem to all of us. Good thing, Gie was willing to help us financially.

Taiwan and Jen left at 3. He left his component too. Yes! I could watch CD freely.

Four-fifty I left Bautista for collection job.

In Gate 2, I bought plastic stools after my work. I have used my bargaining power. I have acquired them for P 80 each. I have saved P20 from four stools.

When I got home, Gie and Flor were singing along, as if we were not in problem. I sang along with them too.

Ten, I watched a movie that latter shifted to porn.

 

January 03, 2007

Seven, I got up. After breakfast I washed Hanna's rubber mats which were used by Yoshimi.

Before ten, my "mag-ina" was dropped by my in- laws who would go to Boso-Boso. I was surprised by it. At first, I was thinking if I would care of Mj's presence. I couldn't reject her. Thus, I talked to her though she and I have been in a misunderstanding.

Mj related me a good tiding that Tito Jay, who has just known about her pregnancy would send her P1000 for our second child dresses.

Ten-thirty, I paid P 85 to Ate Grace. It was my credit since 2006.

Eleven-thirty, Mj undergoes "hilot." Tiya Ruby did it. We pay P50 for her service. It's fair! Most important thing is she announced that our baby's is fine.

Since I took Revicon multivitamins, a while ago, I got sleepy. I took a nap.

Five, I left Bautista to Gate 2. There, I experienced grievances from tenants who were thinking that P20 a day for electric consumption was unfair for them. I didn't mind them.

Then I bought Nursery Rhymes VCD for Hanna, diapers, hanger and viands. When I arrived home Jano was delighted to see our viand. He did the cooking.

Seven, right after I turned off the TV and component, Hanna woke up crying. She vomited. We had a hard time putting back her to sleep again.

 

January 04, 2007

Eight, I got up though I wouldn't want to. I bought a drum of water. Gie fills the other containers.

Nine, after breakfast I played Hanna's new CD, while I was sweeping. I then realized how lucky Hanna was for she could hear nursery rhymes unlike when I was a child. Plus, she could watch cartoons now. Before, we have no TV. If we want to watch, we will go to our neighbor to avail the latest TV shows. Hanna Margaret is so lucky!

Twelve, when I was trying to sleep in Flor's room when idea popped out. I approached Flor to tell her friends about an "ukay-ukay" I would put up. Good thing she quickly acted. Thus, I unkept my clothes which I am not using. Gie supported me, as well. Mj thinks of Nanay's stuffs after one hour of preparation, customer starts to scramble. At past 2, we have earned P245 from four persons. Wow! We were all delighted to its result. Other buyers were looking for more. Thus, Mj decided to ask for my in-laws’ stocks, so as Gie.

She would ask her brother for his used clothes.

This is what I was planning long ago. And now it has come to a realization. I just hope it will click. I was looking forward to venture in buy-n-sell. Divisoria is the place to be. All I need is support. This is a fund-raising. I want to buy a cabinet for Mama so that her stuffs would be put in a right place.

But before I forgot, Tito Boy told us a bad news at 10am. Lolo Candoy has passed away. It's a sad news. I never had a chance to see him. It was along ago since we see each other-alas!

But good thing he affects my life, for good!

Five, I left to Gate 2. There I waited for even to long, who borrowed the receipts. I did the collection easily. I was just interfered by a collection's problem.

I met Diyang in Gate 2. We rode in same jeep. She looks different. She's the one who saw me, because I never noticed her. We talked inside the vehicle. She gives Hanna a chocolate.

When I arrived home, Jano wasn't home yet. Flor hands down the P70 additional sale. In all, we earn P315. Not bad!

Jano arrived after we have kept the clothes. Alas! He didn't see our set up. Good thing, he was delighted to know about it. However, he was saddened by the sad news about the death of Lolo Candoy.

 

January 05, 2007

I got up early at 6:30 AM to start my day and to open my 'ukay-ukay' business early. However, I haven't done it. Instead, I swept at the yard.

Eight, Mj left to their house. She would tell her family about our business so as to ask Nanay if she could give us their clothes she was keeping.

Nine, I was so bored. Customers were not coming as frequent as yesterday.

Ten, April and Dick came in we watched DVD. April was anticipating for bags.

Twelve, we've earned P40. At last! Less the rice expense. Whew! Negative. I wanted to back out. But I must pursue since MJ was determined to this. Besides we're just starting.

April and Dick were suggesting that we must put our merchandises besides the street/ highway. I told them that it would be if we have lot of items to be sold.

MJ arrived at 4. She only brought few items. But the important thing was she have packed and gathered lot of merchandises which would be dropped by my in-laws’ house tomorrow.

I left to Gate 2 at 5. I was home at 6:30.

When I asked Flor and Mj if they have earned while I was away, they told me “None." It frustrates me, for expense was greater than gross income. Imagine, P120 was the expense. P40 was only the earnings.

I meet Mrs. Ilagan and Elma in the jeep to gate 2 at 5. The former is my high school adviser. She was a former Ms. Jeanette Reposar. The latter was my schoolmate. We three talked. I regarded Ma'am Reposar's life. She has now three kids. I also told/remind her about our upcoming 10-year Anniversary on 2008 or 1st Alumni homecoming. She was willing to organize it. She regarded also Chriz and Jano. Elmo told me about her brother Sancho who's my classmate.

Jano did not give me budget, Huh? What? He would really rely on my salary and to my 'ukay-ukay' business?

I made; I mean I started foremost to it tonight P100 which was to be lessened to our net income.

Nine I wrote this:

January 06, 2007

Honey,

Yehey! We've made it this long! Three years gave us enough time to know each other closely. We've been in multifarious LQ'S, fights and understanding. We've been temporarily by chance. We've been challenged by fate, by love and by God above. Three years has been memorable for me and you. Thank you for all the love, care, understanding and support. You deserve my appreciation. Thank you for everything you shared with me.

I just want to solicit from you and continuous love, care support and understanding. For that we could have a long-lasting relationship.

Happy 3rd year Anniversary!

Tsup!

Bee,

January 06, 2007

These are my activities today:

8am—opening the home-based store

9am---waiting for my in-laws

10am—starting to get irked due to' sales-lessness'

Afternoon---videoke-ing

5pm---going to gate 2 and working there

6pm---remitting the P2970 (collection for 7 days) to Tito Jun

8pm---cooking

9pm---singing-along with my siblings

Today, we have earned P225. I saved P100 to our bank.

Tito Jun gave me P250 my allowance. He also told me Jan.15 would be my 'payday'.

I told Jano about my plan of buying-on-instalments refrigerator instead of cabinet. He agrees when I add that I was planning to sell frozen and processed foods and other viands. He would come to think of it, he says.

We videoke till past 10.

 

January 07, 2007

Six-thirty, Auntie Helen and Tito Ben came to pay for the jacket he reserved. It was worth P40.

Then I opened the store, swept the yards and entertained buyers. The stole of us has been noisy and 'saleable'.

However, before that I have written for the bereaved family of Pastor Furaque a letter which I hand to Tito Sam who would be a carrier:

We have earned P300 today. IT's maybe because there were new arrivals from my in-laws who dropped the merchandises early at 8:30 am.

I also buy worth P80 to Tamtam and Sarah. Is could be earned 100 % from them. Though, they're so old and roughly used.

Tintin, Romeo, Tito Ben and Auntie Helen were my buyers today. All in all, the income was good.

 

January 08, 2007

I woke up early to wait for water supply-truck. While waiting I swept and burnt dried leaves.

Past nine, a young girl peddler made a "Buena–mano" sales. She bought worth P30 and promised to be back tomorrow.

The next thing happened was the increase of sales. I then thought of that young girl. She's the lucky 'first customer!

Roy and Mahel buy worth P250.

Our sales ranged to P580. It was the biggest income so far.

I was planning to buy in 'custom' our stocks were slowly decreasing due to daily sales. It needs to be filled out frequently.

In Gate 2, a Muslim lady—sales lady has been interested to me. Thus, I must continue befriending with her. Another woman, who owns a pharmacy-like tent, talks to me, about crucial things. I should say that I was now making a wide range of friendship. I called it friendship because they could be my friends till I was working as a collector.

 

January 09, 2007

I woke up early because MJ and Hanna would leave today, and I have to wash our clothes.

The young girl yesterday came back with her 'amo!

My 'mag-ina' left at 10am. I was then almost done in laundry works. It was only waiting for water.

I told MJ that she must have merchandise for 'ukay-ukay,' so that number of buyers would increase. Besides, they love to choose from new arrival.

As of, 5pm my sales were only P35. Bad luck! It's okay. At last, I have earned.

In gate 2, I talk to my friend there about my business. She ordered shorts and sando for her.

I slept early at past nine.

 

January 10, 2007

I got up at 6;00 AM. While waiting for water supply, I opened my 'ukay-ukay' store and swept at the yards.

Next, I was waiting annoyingly. It was a very long wait. Then, when it arrived, that was when I have pursued clothes-rinsing and dishwashing.

As of 10:30 AM, I still don't have sales. Yet, I'm hopeful to make an earning today. Buy-and-sell business is risky. However, it's also a greener pasture.

Five, when I left to Cogeo. The sale is still zero. It was a disappointing day!

After collection, I satisfied my hunger with a cheap yet yummy hamburger, near the Jollibee. Then, I reward myself with new sandals worth P130.

 

January 11, 2007

I rose up at 6:30 to open the store.

The next hours had been so boring. Customers did not appear as of ten o'clock. I have got no sales even P5.

Mj hasn't arrived, too.

One PM, customers came in. They buy worth P40. It somehow wipes away my frustration. That's when Dea arrived. We then talked. My project was postponed. But it's okay. At least, I have learned new things about her and she learns more from me.

She bade goodbye at 2:30.

Before I left to Gate 2, I have had a sales again worth P40.

In Cogeo, I did my job quickly so that I could roam around the market and do more some window-shopping.

I met the Muslim girl at a mini mart.

I was surprised when I got home because my 'mag-ina' was there. I then pity Mj for she bore Hanna, Hanna's stuffs and ukay-ukay merchandise. She was supposed to meet me there. However, we never see each other because I have done the collection very early at 5:30.

Gie and Jano arrived at 8. Good thing, I bought 'ulam.'

 

January 12, 2007

I got up early and opened the store. I was then waiting for buyer, but no one arrived. I thought Tintin and April would buy, but they don't.

It was past one when a 'buena mano' was made through sales from Arlene worth P70. Thanks to Diyang who induced her to buy.

Before I rode a jeepney through Gate 2, my 'suki' came to buy. She made a P40 worth of stocks.

Gate 2. Collection was made easily and short period of time. I was now more at ease in my job. I was now more at ease in my job.

Then, I bought Flor's requests ---coin purse, badges, and key chain. They were worth P40, and I would gain P20 on them. It's a buy-and-sell. I will be going to 'career' it.

I was also planning to have a load station here. Plus, the plan of buying (on instalment) of a ref so that I could sell processed foods, etc. Since, I was working near the market. I could possibly do it successfully. I just pray to God for his help. I was doing it for my family.

 

January 13, 2007

I rose up at 6:30 to open the store. I was hoping for big earnings. However, I have earned nothing, as of 10.

Taiwan arrived. He brought us merchandise. I gave him P50 as payment in advance.

I was so disappointed today. We're 'bokya' again. This was the second time. Good thing, Jano gave me P150 for our budget. At least, my burden would be lessened.

Five, I left Bautista for my collection job. There, in Gate 2, I have had a chance to talk to my 'kabiruan.' She has learned from me about my 'mag-ina.' I also have learned from her that she's a mother already.

I was supposed to remit the collection to Tito Jun, but he was not there. Thus, I left the remittance to Nanay. I just borrowed P105 in the remittance for my allowance.

I was home before 8 PM. I was so tired, yet I managed to cook our dinner.

 

January 14, 2007

Since I opened my 'ukay-ukay' business, I never had an '8 AM- awakening'. It's always been a 6:30. But it's okay. I always advocate 'the earlier, the better."

Rodea makes a 'buena mano' sale of P5 worth. I thought they're going to buy more. But it's alright. I am always optimistic. Besides, it's a less-expenses-business because rent expense was a less.

Past one, Ate Eireen came in. She chose among my 'ukay-ukay' merchandises. She made sales of P100. She completed my day! She increased my earnings.

When Jano and Gie arrived, the latter sold her stuffs or used clothing to me. Though, I was so worried if I could still earn from them, I still accepted her price of P200.

In Gate 2, I have had a bonding with a 'tindero' there. He's gay and he always shouts, "Ilaw na naman?!” every time I come near to his tent. Now we have had a friendship on our hearts. He understands me. I understand him. In fact, he agreed when I asked him if I could buy on credit.

Before I go home, I bought Ceelin for Hanna. It's because I have known from Mj that Nanay was questioning why I couldn't buy Hanna since I am earning from 'ukay-ukay.' It hurts me. The truth is I didn't know that Hanna was out of vitamins already. Mj just told me late.

After dinner and after my baby has fallen asleep, I computed my sales and expenses for 11 days (including this day). I have come up with this:

Gross Sales (January 4 to Jan 14) P1785

Less: Total Expenses P1206

NET INCOME P579

Take note: I have two-days zero sales, which were January 10 and 13. I also have receivables.

Then, I have had savings of P400 and tangible assets such as 2 dozens of hangers and unsold merchandises which are estimated to P10,000 worth.

Haay! I'm so excited to make this an extended business. I want to expand. "So, help me God."

 

January 15, 2007

I rose up early at 7 so that Mj would get up early, too. She would go to their house today. It was past 9 when she and Hanna left Bautista.

After I have done my rinsing job, I pursue the "Letters, Etc." while waiting for Mj's text to Tintin's cellphone. It was past 12 when she came to relay the message, which has saddened me.

Afternoon. I was so mad and frustrated because my supposed 'sahod' today was delayed. The reason why my 'mag-ina' was there was because of it. However, it was postponed and it's still questionable.

Plus, as of 4 PM, sales income was still P0.00. Haay! What's happening to my business?!

Four-thirty, I left Bautista. After collection, I went to my in-laws' house. There, Mj accompanied me through Tito Jun's house. Unfortunately (again), he's not there. So, I decided to go home with my 'mag-ina'.

In Gate 2, Hanna pronounced 'be', pointing to Jollibee. We're supposed to dine in there. So, we just enter and go out after a while. In lieu, we buy cheap hamburger nearby.

Then, we enter in Althea, a clothing mart. Hanna saw Hello Kitty slippers and grabbed a pair. She did not put it down till I decided to buy it for her. Alas! It's not that only I wanted to buy for her. If only I have received my salary.

At home. Flor immediately hands me down the cash sales of P50. It’s actually, P70. She bought viand worth P20. It somehow gladdens me. I thought we're sales-less today. Thanks, God!

Hanna was singing tonight. She seems to be so happy. But, why?

 

January 16, 2007

Waking up early has been my routine chore. Then, I must maintain the surroundings' cleanliness. It would somehow attract customers.

As of twelve, sale was P0.00. It gives me a sad aura. Plus, we discover that a sleeveless shirt was missing. We suspected Diyang, who was here last night and helped Flor in keeping the stocks. Thus, I went down to their house to see if it's there. And I could feel it. She's guilty. I could see it in her acts. I could tell it due to her words. But it's okay.

Two, Mamay bought a blouse and shoes on credit. She promised to pay the P50 tomorrow.

I was still hoping for Tito Jun's signal that I have to receive my salary. However, it has been a frustration. Hmp! My credit in the collection is increasing. It amounted to P450 or more, now. I hope and wish I would receive it soon.

Today is Tai-Jen's anniversary. I could still remember ---their wedding was the reason why I was here in Antipolo.

I hope Mama comes home or arrives tomorrow.

January 17, 2007

Today is supposed to be my Mama's arrival that I hoped for. She did not.

Today is Hanna Margaret's 18-month birthday. I planned to prepare something, but due to the postponement of my salary, I couldn't afford to. Plus, 'ukay-ukay' sale was still rare and tame. Alas! In fact, today is full of disappointments.

Haay! I'm so worried that I could not pay my debt to the collection money, which was amounted to P550, as of tonight. If only daily income from 'ukay-ukay' was enough to cover our expenses.

I couldn't blame Hanna for this, who consumes milk and diaper. I must not!

"Please, God, help me."

 

January 19, 2007

The day has been the same day as yesterday. It was so boring, unlucky! The sale was P0.00 again. It almost makes me mad.

I texted Meann but she did not reply till Mj, Hanna and I went to Gate 2, together. I decided to push her to leave so that she could ask what happened to my salary why it was 'pending'.

After collection, I bonded with my friend there. She is so friendly. In fact, I call her 'ate'.

It was 8 PM when we parted ways. We had talked a lot –from my baby to her pregnancy, etc.

When I was home, Jano gave me P200 for budget. It would somehow lessen to my debt in the collection money. However, I was still worrying that I could use all of them in our daily needs so as Hanna's milk and diapers.

 

January 20, 2007

Seven, I rose up. I opened the store.

Eight, I was doing laundry.

Past nine, my in-laws arrived to tell me that Mj wants me to meet me before I remit the money to Tito Jun this night.

I watched TV all day. I tried to nap yet I was frustrated.

At five, I left home to collect electric consumptions by tent tenants in Gate 2. I was so excited to receive my salary –my very first salary. Thus, I expedite the job.

Six-thirty, I was there at my in-laws' house. Hanna was feverish due to 'pilay.' Then, Mj hands me down my wage which was P900 (less P100 for Hanna's Tempra). Haay! It's disappointing earnings! Although Tito Jun says it was just like a commission, I still was frustrated and mad. Besides, commission is not the term. It must be --- consolation.

My credit amounted to P695. Thus, the money left for me was only P100 from my first wage. I left P50 for Hanna's needs.

Mj tried to stop me from going home. I still did. I was home at 9. Jano was not yet home. They arrived at 10:30.

 

January 21, 2007

Right after breakfast, I did leaves-and-trashes burning at our dump site, while waiting for my mag-ina's arrival.

Eleven, Ate Eireen talked to me about her current business, which is recreational site for her friends and colleagues, who are playing gun fillet like real armies. It interests me. It would be a good source of income if they would only make it realized.

Four, I was invited to Romeo's birthday celebration. I thought Tintin would pay me but she didn't till I go home at five.

Past five, I left home for my job.

In Gate 2, I was met by Mj. Thus, I expedite my job. Before we ride jeep, we enter Jollibee as if I would order. I pity Hanna. I couldn't afford to buy her even a cheapest one.

Seven, we're home. I immediately went down to join 'inuman' there. It's been a long time since I last did it.

I was so happy, though I don't feel the taste of Generoso brandy. I just did it for 'pakikisama.'

I was drunk already when I went home at 12 mn. Good thing, I have had my dinner there.

 

January 22, 2007

When I rose up to open the store, my head was aching, and I was feeling nausea-and-vomiting. I have a so-called hang-over. Good thing is I did not throw up.

I went downhill at Tito Ben's house, to ask him where Mama from that time is. He told me that she was already in Bulan. Alas!

I missed her. I want her to go home. I want to talk to her about he plans.

Four, I left Bautista so that I could do my agenda. First, to have the rice milled for Hanna's am. I pity her. I must do this (again) and, to buy Flor's sim, to inquire sim for Smartload and to bring Jano's cp at the cellphone repair shop.

I did them all, however the cp wasn't repaired. They couldn't fix it. I only wasted time.

On the way home, I was thinking what the horoscope says that my lucky number was 22 and lucky day was Monday. I think I was so unlucky today. Mind you, the 'ukay-ukay' sales was zero, not to mention the forced shift of Hanna's food into am.

Haay! Till when we would be like this!?

 

January 23, 2007

When I got up, I could see an unlucky day before us. I could feel it. Then, when Mj rose up I could see her worry about 'milklessness' of Hanna. My credit on my collection was starting to get bigger. I was so worried too.

Ten, I decided to go to Veterans, s that I could sell my sperm cell/body/flesh/strength to a gay who once shows me rudeness when the time I was not yet ready, and I wasn't in need. Now, it's the time! However, when I was there, I started to fell shame. I did not know what to do and speak. I wanted to be frank and say that I need money for my baby's milk. Yet, my tongue stuck in. thus, I changed my mind. I then buy Hanna's milk (Lactum), for the first time. But before that I have asked him if he needs a store helper. Bad thing is he already had. I was hesitant to tell him that I'm Taiwan's brother.

Afternoon, I tried to calm my mind. I tried to hide and forget my problems.

Five, I left Bautista. I supposed to go home late so that I would not have to buy viand, however I feel guilt. Thus, I bought fish and left home early. Good thing is I have seen a vacant job. It's an appliance/furniture center. Tomorrow, I will apply. If only I have brought my biodata.

"Please, Lord, help me. Give me that job."

 

January 24, 2007

When I got up, I already have decided to take over Mj's laundry work. So, I did quickly. It's due to what my friend-at-the-market have advised me. Pregnant women deserve a rest.

I was so glad when sales worth P60 was made at 8:30 AM. At last! For almost a week of 'saleslessness.'

Nine-ten, I went to Bukal for rinsing purposes. There, I waited so long for my turn. Good thing there was a free space where I could somehow rinse the clothes though I would spend too much time.

It was 11 when I got home.

Minutes after, a quarrel between me and Mj was made due to her 'pag-iinarte.' I just reprimand her why she forgot to tell me that Hanna was out of cooked am. She also did not initiatively cook but rather waited for me and for Hanna to revolt against hunger. I was so tired, yet she annoyed me. Instead of consoling me, she had rather acted like sleeping lizard. And, when I called her to have a lunch, she declines. I hate it! It's the trigger point. I hate a person if he/she snobs a blessing, like food. I told her to leave but she did not. I stressed out that I didn't need a person who would only increase my burdens.

Past three, I left home. I was going to apply in a furniture store in Gate 2. However, when I got there, a signage was taken away. It's gone. I looked around the market for another vacancy.

At 4, I've seen nothing.

While doing my job, my 'amiga' introduced her husband to me.

Before I left Gate 2, I bought Mj's Ferrous Fumerate. She needs to increase her blood pressure. I don't want to be blamed.

I arrived home at past 6:30. It's the earliest, so far!

Mj's lunch wasn't eaten. Thus, I took it in.

While cooking, we're still in red flags. While dining, we don't talk to each other. However, while watching TV, she asks from me 'tableya', a cacao ball, I was eating as a dessert. It means we're okay.

Today is my first month in collection job. Also, today is Mj's 8th month pregnancy.

 

January 25, 2007

Past 7, when I woke up. I immediately open the store and sweep at the surrounding.

Sales was P0.00 again. But it's okay! I have already accepted disappointments due to 'saleslessness.' It's better to be surprised. Expecting is more disappointing.

Though Mj was talking to me, we we're still not in the same condition. The vexation, usual vexation was gone. She also never asked me what happened to my job application yesterday and how much her Vitamin B Complex are.

Quarter to five, I left to gate 2.

Six-thirty, I was home. This was the 2nd time arrive home early. It's because I was not now window-shopping in Gate 2 due to 'moneylessness.'

Jano and Gie arrived at 9, I have computed my debt to the collection money. It's now P495 excluding my weekly allowance of P250. Haay! I'm scared I couldn't pay it till Saturday. Good thing if I will have sales tomorrow.

 

January 26, 2007

I forced myself to wake up early at 7. Thus, after opening the store, I started cleaning our backyard.

The 'ukay-ukay' sales was still zero.

I was problematic today because I am going to remit the collection tomorrow night. In fact, I have had a hard time in budgeting while I was in Gate 2. I don't want to spend more than P30 for our dinner.

When I was home, Jano was there already. I secretly was disappointed to him that he didn't even buy viand. There's no rice, too.

Now, I was planning to tell Mj that I want her and Hanna to stay at their house (in Rancho) till I have a stable job.

I really couldn't bear all the expenses. Good thing he gave P300 for budget.

 

January 27, 2007

Still, I woke up early for routine works. "Nakakasawa!" But I must accomplish them. I was so tired displaying the 'ukay-ukay' merchandise which couldn't give us financial freedom since people in Bautista had bought. However, I would still open it till the items are here. I knew there's up and down in business. And now is our 'down' state.

Remittance time. At last, I and Tito Jun see each other again. I personally remit the money to him. He also personally told me that he's 'abunado' to my incentive. The worst thing he said is about the possibility that I could be recommended to his boss if the new market opens. It hurts me. He used the word 'pwede.' It means, I could be a collector again and I could not be. It was not that sure. Thus, I went home wearily. My shoulders were sagging.

Then, when I got home, Diana Go was here. She would have known about the P200 Jano left. But I have used it. I paid it to the collection money. I explained to her all—my situation, my financial stature. Good thing, she understands. I pity her, too, because she went home with P70 on her palm.

We (Mj and I) watched TV till 12 MN.

 

January 28, 2007

Though I was still sleepy, I got up early. I started anticipating for Mama which was worsened by Flor's tidings from Auntie Helen. According to her, Mama and Tito Benson were already at Auntie Vangie's house. I waited anxiously.

Then at 12, Diana's son arrived. It was wrong time. I have no sales. Tintin returned the ants. She only paid P60. So, I must owe P70. Bad thing is Tito Sam has no low denomination for the amount I needed. Thus, in my frustration and madness, I shouted very loud. I almost ruin my throat. That's how I managed my anger—anger to myself and annoyance to Diana, who could not wait till Monday though I proposed it last night. Finally, I commanded Flor to owe from Ate April. She never failed me. Minutes after, the collector has left. My mood came back.

Jano arrived minutes ago. He was with Gie.

And at 4, Mama and Tito Benson arrived. They were with Chriz and Tito Zaldo and Kuya Japi.

Mama brought my stuffs from Mama Leling's house. They were my things I left there including my book, script, necklace, and clothes.

Six-thirty, I was home. I noticed disorderliness, confusion and noisome in our house due to the presences of Flores brothers and others, which were rooted from Papay Benson's arrival. I hate it! But it's okay. I understand.

Bad trip! Electric current disrupts our TV viewing.

While waiting for them to go home, I have had a chance to talk to Mama. I asked her about Lolo Aton's battle against Elizaga. I regarded if I have a chance to win the tenancy. However, Mama did not accept the owner's offer. Alas! It would be a stable source of income. I would rather take it than to have a job here in the metro.

January 29, 2007

It was Mama who woke me up early, despite of terrible cold. I rose up too. I was so dismayed by the clutters in the surroundings due to a terrible wind last night.

Papay Benson and I talked about my present job. He advised me to look for a part time job since I only work for a very short period of hour every day. I couldn't say anything. If he only knew.

Good thing about Papay Benson's presence is Lolo Angel gave us pork. At least I have had savings. Our lunch viand was free—expense less!

I had no chance of talking with Mama because she was busy. I really wanted to tell her about my plans. Alas! She was invited again to cook at Lola Alice' house.

'Ukay-ukay' sales was still zero. Yet I would still display them every day as long as the merchandises are here.

"Lord God, thank You for the blessings! Thank You for the hope, grace and forgiveness. Please, bless Papay Benson. I pray, oh God that he would get their land title from Auntie Belen. He deserves it. And please expedite Gie's officemate's resignation so that I could take over his position. Thank You! Amen!"

 

January 30, 2007

Despite of cold breeze, I still did some garden works, without even have a hot coffee. Thus, after breakfast, my temperature raises and I started to feel something. Fever of flu was starting. Good thing, it was healed by a tablet of Paracetamol. I surmised it's due to my swelling gums under my chin.

Again, we earn nothing.

Hanna follows to my commands, such as 'sing', 'dance', 'cry' and 'laugh'. She's indeed a smart girl. It's a sign. Thanks, God, for He whispered at me when I was in Gate 2 to buy a cd—which was 'Baby's Day Out'. The home is nice despite of its piracy defect. It's appropriate to her. If only she knew how to behave while watching.

 

January 31, 2007

Waking up early has been my routine, so as sweeping dried leaves in the yards.

After I have done sweeping, April arrived. She confided at me about Tito Ben's 'pagwawala.' According to her, she would rather live with her in-laws than to take her father's meanness. I pity her.

At 3, they were still here. We bonded with boiled cassava and hot coffee.

Five, I left Bautista. In Gate 2, once again I experienced hardship. There are so many collection problems arise such as 'receiptlessness,' etc. I wanted to give up. If only I have another job.

Past seven when I was home. I told it to Mj. I proposed to her that I wanted to resign. She agreed.

Before I sleep, I jot down a letter for Epr. I'm going to send it before his graduation this coming March.

February 1, 2007

I was awakened by Hanna's tantrum at 8. It's okay.

Nine, Rodea arrived to pay her debt. She gave me P30. Then, she has learned from me that absence of marriage license of a child's parent is not a hindrance anymore in getting a birth certificate.

Sales-less, again!

Five, Mj, Hanna and I went to Cogeo. My 'mag-ina' was going to my in-laws' house for a reason. She's going to know if Tito Jay has already sent his promise – a financial help for my second baby's needs. She also needs to prepare for our baby's stuffs, for his/her birth is just around a corner.

Mj has been understanding. She did not ask for money from me though Hanna's milk was just good for one day. She pities me for I owe much on the collection money.

"Lord God, thank You for the blessings – for the love, understanding, faithfulness and wonderful life. Lord, give me a secured, better life and a stable job. I couldn't hide it from You. I'm worrying so much. Now that we're going to be four-membered family, I would need a high-paying job. And my job today wasn't that I was looking for. It's obviously a mere part-time one. I propose, You give us daily sales in our 'ukay-ukay' biz. Feed my family. Besides, Hanna's needs were increasing. Diaper. Milk. Vitamins. Shampoo. Milk bath. Lotion. Etc. Plus..our incoming baby. So, please, God, help me. Amen."

 

February 2, 2007

Though my 'mag-ina' wasn't here, I still woke up early. However, I did not sweep outside.

At one, I have written a note for MJ. This will be presented to her on February 6, on our 37th monthsary. It goes like this:

Honey,

After two years of our colorful togetherness, we're now facing another milestone, a partner must take. I just hope you understand me always. It's better if you know me well so that clashes will be avoided.

Happy 37th mensisary!

Thank you for taking care of yourself--- which adversely affects my children. Tsup!

Bee,

I also pursue my project, "Letters, Etc." I only have time to face this whenever she's not here.

Wind was terrible. It's so disgusting. It also makes everything dusty, including mg 'ukay-ukay' merchandises.

Four-thirty, sales was made by Lola Alice and Tita Lanie. I thanked God for He's great. He answered my prayer last night. Sixty pesos isn't bad.

I also have learned that Mam was at Auntie Belen's house today. She might go home tomorrow o she might go back to Bulan with Papay Benson, according to Lola Alice.

Eight, electric disruption happened. It was due to a strong wind, maybe. Alas! Annoying!

 

February 3, 2007

Before Jano and Gie left to work, the former hands down to me the budget of P300. It would somehow alleviate my burden due to indebtedness in collection money.

Past eight, a ‘buena mano’ sale was made. It was P20 worth. As of 12 noon, sales was P55. Not bad! God is great.

One thirty PM, I was thinking if I would remit the money or not. If I will, we would have no budget, nothing to eat... Hmp!

Five, I left Bautista. I was decided not to remit the collection. The sole reason was I couldn't pay my credit to it.

When I was home, Flor meets me with a tiding from Mj, who texted her earlier. I just couldn't understand the news. But I was sure Mj has never been sent by Tito Jay for her 'panganganak.' However, it never gives me worry. I knew we could make it.

 

February 4, 2007

After I have swept and burnt the dried leaves at the yards, I translated Yeng Constantino's 'Hawak-Kamay'. It goes like this:

HOLDING HANDS

Sometimes you are feeling like

The problems are getting tougher

Sometimes you are feeling weak

And you could exclaim

I wanna give up.

Just look above the heaven

You might somehow find something better

It is nice if you call me

And you will know that I'm just here

Anytime...

Holding hands ( I will never leave you/I will still here holding on)

In this journey

(Here in world full of uncertainties/to the world of nothingness)

Don't claim and say that

You are all alone

Always remember

You are with someone

I'm here for you, for you

In the world of nothingness

Holding hands

Holding hands

In the world of nothingness.

Eleven, Flor hands me down a white envelope enclosing P140 cash from Mama. It gladdens me. I never thought she would send me. I have just told her before that if Lola Alice gives her as incentive in cooking, I would borrow it. She did! She's so kind. I thought she's already in Bulan. Yet, she's still in Sauyo, working?! Pity her. She's supposed to be taking a rest. She's so tired working. All her years, she's working. My anger (rage, it is) to Evelyn Diokno worsens. It's all her fault! Mama gains nothing because of her greediness. She sold Mama for her own's sake. Mama did not even start a secondary education.

I was decided not to remit the money, again. I would remit it next Saturday. However, if Tito Jun says, I will. Or, if my in-laws come, I will send it.

 

February 5, 2007

Past six, when I rose up to start the day. Good thing, water supply truck comes early. Thus, I have started laundry early.

Ten-thirty, Tintin and April came. It was when Mj texted me saying she was going to meet in Gate 2 this afternoon. She also tells me that Hanna's no more milk already. However, it does not sadden me, especially when she told me about Tito Jay's 'padala' that would arrive on Feb. 15.

Twelve, since I was all alone, I watched a film --- "Lovers' Symphony.” It's nice! It's the nicest love story I've ever watched so far. It made me cry. The film reminds me of our ex-pet, Jazzy. She resembles with that dog named Toby.

All in all, the story is amazing. I think I couldn't forget it for the rest of my life. It educates me. I have learned two things: (1) "Love comes when you least expected it", and (2) "Loyalty is a trait to be valued for life.'' I've also proved that "money can't buy happiness. Whew! I should have watched this on Valentine's Day as our Valentine's Day treat.

Three PM, I have made a candle out from the tears of the melted candle.

Four-thirty, I left to gate 2. I must be early to enable to meet my 'mag-ina' there. However, they're late. It's okay. I missed Hanna.

Mj confirmed about Tito Jay's money 'padala.' It gladdens me. It somehow alleviates my worry and fear. I would not be scared that I could not pay midwife's fee.

I pity Hanna when Mj prefers to buy "Alaska' over Lactum 1+ for our baby. Though we're on financial crisis, health or nutrition must not be sacrificed. Bad thing is I still bought one.

 

February 6, 2007

Today is our 37th mensisary. I gave my greetings to Mj at 9. She did not have one for me. It's okay! At least, I did it.

Two PM, I went to Gate 2, early for two reasons. First, I would inquire how much would I pay in cellphone repair, and second, I would go to my in-laws' house to fetch the stuffs of our second child.

In Rancho, I left the collection money. I and Nanay also talked about things such as Mj's giving birth. Nanay also asked me how much my credit to the collection money is.

In Gate 2, I have had a hard time budgeting. Plus, I bought Lactum 1+ for Hanna.

 

February 7, 2007

My sleep was disturbed by the 3 early risers. Thus, I was forced to get up early at quarter to six. I cooked am and French fries, eventually.

After lunch, I felt drowsiness. So, I took a nap. It was 3 when I rose up to prepare for my collection job. I was so excited to claim the cellphone.

There, I was so glad when I got the cp. It's okay now!

Before I went home, I did marketing. I bought 'halaan' for Mj. 'Halaan' is best for a breastfeeding mother or it's crucial to induce breast milk. I just hope it will help Mj to have milk on her mammary gland. If this will so, we would not experience milk crisis again as we had when Hanna was born.

I texted Taiwan to borrow his cp on Feb. 19 or 20. He did not decline. Another thing, he told me that Epr texted him yesterday. I asked his number, which was Hyde's . I was so glad to have it.

 

February 8, 2007

I woke up early to do laundry.

Epr texted me 'Gud morning, Froi!" Whoaah! It makes me merry. Having that number completes my day. At least now I have had a contact with my closest and best friend.

Afternoon, sales was made by a truck driver. Iw as so glad for it. I never expect it.

Four-thirty-five, I left to Gate 2. There, I inquire at the Boardwalk's information center. It interests me. I filled out application form, but it's not yet finished.

After collection I bought sim card for e-load business. It was my long-ago plan. Now that I have it my income would increase. It will also increase my 'ukay-ukay' sales.

 

February 9, 2007

It was 4:30 when Hanna cried for milk. It has been the reason why I got up after Jano and Gie left. I then open the store--the earliest opening, ever. Next, I swept and burnt dried leaves.

Noon. I approached Roy. I asked if he could contact the midwife, who helped Mahel in giving birth to Sandy. He assured me that he's going to help us.

Three. Elsie's and Mahel make sales of P80. I was so glad for my business was still working.

Past four, I left Bautista. In Gate 2, I bought e-load. It's my first time. I was so confident that this racket would click.

After collection, ate Daisy borrowed P300 from the collection money. But before that I inquired, asked, and talked about Boardwalk, with Ate Mirasol. I was so interested in it. I will be going to take a membership. Five hundred is not that hard to provide.

At home, loading the very first e-load has been sent to a wrong number. It was sent twice. Thus, I was loss of P35. But it's okay. First time is indeed bloody --- hurtful.

When Jano and Gie arrived, they have learned about my loading business. Bad thing is Gie paid me or the amount I have spent in eating her cellphone repaired. It saddens me. However, it doesn't lose my kop because there's a vacant mobile which I could use.

Jano disagreed I told him m plan of roofing the vacant space at the back –for our room. He suggested that we must use Flor's room.

 

February 10, 2007

I woke up early. It's my first day of e-loading business. I posted my signage: E-Load Available Here. I was so excited.

Next thing happened; the loaders came. I then realized that it's a click. I also hoped that I would adversely affect my 'ukay-ukay' business, for good. The loaders would also but clothes.

Then at 10 Am, I come to an idea of 'haluhalo business. It is n time, now. The summer heat starts to rise. Besides, I want to be the first to do the business here in Bautista. And, I will also have more income in 'ukay-ukay' and e-load because of it. Jano is indeed right. I must make this business area.

Past twelve, I left to Gate 2. I would bring the impaired cp to a repair center. However, it would not be repaired by them. I would only spend much on it. It disappoints me.

Before 12:30, I was already at my in-laws' house. There, I told Nanay about my arrival. I saw her gladness from my effort. I borrowed ice grinder for 'halo-halo' biz. I also told them how much my debt is in the collection money. Then, I texted Sabel, so that Mama calls.

Mama called after a while. I confided her about Mj's pregnancy and room problem. She assured me that she will be here before Mj gives birth.

Four, I left Rancho.

Five-something, I was doing a marketing of 'halo-halo' ingredients. I was praying for God's guidance and blessings.

Six-thirty, I was home. I was so happy. I was so glad. Plus, it increases when Mj told me that we had 'ukay-ukay' sales of P155 and P20 load. God's great!

Good thing, Hanna slept early. I have cooked the 'sahog' of 'halo-halo' without her distractions.

Mj texted Tito Jun. She told him about why I haven't remitted the collection. He just didn't reply.

Jano and Gie arrived. I thought she's going to take back the cp. Good thing, she did not. She already has a mobile phone of her own. Jano's cp was interchanged to mine. It gladdens me.

Eleven, before we sleep, Tito Jun replied to our text. He said "Ok'. And he has no extra mobile phone. We also reminded him of used clothes for 'ukay-ukay'. He promised 'next week.'

February 11, 2007

When I got up to pee at 4 AM, I haven't fallen back to sleep, thus at 4:35, I was already preparing for 'halo-halo' business. I prepared the stuffs such as table, spoons, canisters, ingredients, signage, etc.

Ten, we're already starting selling.

Next thing happened; we're all occupied. Though customers were few, we’re being crammed whenever there were more than one orders.

E-load business goes well, too.

Diana Go arrived at past 4. She needs money. Jano wasn't here to give her money for Kzel's medications. She instead bought from credit on my 'ukay-ukay.' It's worth P260. But it would be less to Jano's credit on her. Jano, for sure, would not pay me.

I left to Gate 2 very late.

In Gate 2, I handed down P1000 to Ate Daisy. It's because she texted me that she needs money. Her total debt from the collection money was P1300. She promised me to pay the amount tomorrow.

Then, I apologized to Mirasol, Boardwalk's Junior Marketing Consultant that I have left her brochure. She's so kind. Thus, I was forced to order 3 n 1 baby socks worth P139 (less 25% = P104). However, it's nice to know that I was now a member of Boardwalk.

Marketing. That's what I did before going home. It has been so easy to me now. I was doing it for more than six weeks now.

When I was home, I've learned a maddening truth about the milk she opened. It was so hard to keep or store if it's opened. It needs to be refrigerated.

 

February 12, 2007

Again, I woke up early. I have set myself for a project. It's a general cleaning at Flor's room. We would take it since Mj was about to give birth.

I and Mj were occupied that morning. I was doing laundry while Mj was reorganizing the stuffs. Plus, I must do garden works and prepare 'halo-halo' ingredients.

April and Tin made the 'buena mano'. It's indeed a good luck. The sales today was a bit more than yesterday. However, the e-load was a bit less than yesterday and last yesterday. But the effort was still the same.

Minutes before five we're already closed. Then, I expedite going to Cogeo. Unfortunately, I left Boardwalk form. So, I had to go back home. Good thing I remembered at Cabading.

I thought I was late, but Ate Daisy was indeed absent. I started to worry. She's about to pay her debt of P1300 to me that afternoon.

When I was home, my head is boiling. Good thing, Mj told me about Ate Daisy's text –saying her father was in coma.

 

February 13, 2007

Today we sell 'banana con yelo.' It's 'matumal.' not like my e-load business. Thus, I must load.

Though I haven't gained or there was no return, I would still pursue selling summer beverages. In fact, I will sell or offer mango shake tomorrow as an additional choice.

Ate Daisy texted and promised to pay her debt tomorrow. It's okay! I have just completed tonight the lacking in the collection, and it was the only amount I needed to remit the money to Tito Jun.

The house became quiet this night due to Jano's absence. He's out-of-town. The most important is the expenses ---the water. The food. He's indeed an expense because he's with Gie.

 

February 14, 2007

For the 4th day, I got up early so that I could prepare for selling summer beverages such as 'banana con yelo' and 'mango coolers'. I started with sweeping the yards.

Past eleven, when we're about to start, Hanna accidentally has broken a drinking glass. She wasn't hurt. Bad thing is I beat her.

The customers ask for 'halo-halo'. They however buy what we're offering. The sales was good. Plus, the e-load racket becomes better. My customers increase in number.

It was past 3 when we packed up. I went to Gate next. Ate Daisy paid me P1000. She also apologized that she couldn't pay P300 yet. She promised to pay the amount on Friday.

After dinner, I made a personalized Valentine card. It says:

Mj,

Valentine's Day does not necessarily mean:

--date

--roses and

--chocolates

It could also celebrate by sweeping the whole day with your Valentine. So, I did!

It also would be special by greeting each other---

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Honey,

I'm maybe busy in all day work and small

business but

I couldn't forget every single, important

Day to be celebrated by you and me...

Happy Hearts' Day!

Bee,

 

February 15, 2007

Seven, it was when I got up. April came over after a while. She sold me a not-so-old 5-peso bill for P5. Next, Tin came over. We agreed upon that would approach Tito Sam about his 'loaning' business.

My in-laws arrived at 9 AM.

Leven, when we're about to start selling 'banana con yelo,' drizzle dropped down. So, we decided not to pursue it.

Minutes later, Taiwan texted me. He was borrowing P1,5000 from me. After some exchanges of text messages, we ended up in a favourable condition. I would lend him P1500, but he has to pawn his mobile phone to me. Thus, I hurried up through Tito Sam. I asked him if he could lend me P1500. He says he would give me the amount on Sunday of Monday. It's okay! I would use the collection money, instead.

One, my in-laws dropped by. I hitched in the car.

Two, I was already at Jen's house. I was so excited to have the mobile phone. However, I didn't leave immediately. I talked to them. I have learned how hard their lives to date. I propose business plans. They, in fact, liked it. I just hoped they come to think of it closely.

Four, I was already at my in-laws' house. I waited for Michael, who promised to buy milk for Hanna, because today was his very first 'sahod,' However, after an hour of waiting, Me-Ann related a bad news about Mike's salary. So, I left without milk.

In Gate 2, I have had no collection due to electrical disruption, I was occupied too. Good thing I was permitted to leave and go home.

I was home at seven. Gie arrived minutes after my arrival. She was here to get her cellphone I used for days.

"Lord God, thank You for these blessings. Thank You for everything. Amen!"

 

February 16, 2007
I was supposed to do laundry, however water supply truck did not arrive. I have done so many households and garden work after I have had breakfast.

Diyang and I talked to Baby Cahilig about Mj's upcoming 'giving birth. She assured us of a low-cost post-natal fee. Then I told it to Mk for which she agreed with.

Eleven, when we started selling summer beverages. It goes better today.

Twelve, Me-Ann texted us to tell that I must go my in-laws house so that I could fetch Hanna's milk. She told us also that Tito Jay hasn't sent us money yet, but he will.

Ate Daisy was texting and miscalling me insistently. She was asking if I could help her financial problem. I did not reply because I couldn't really do anything. I too, was in a crisis. She's a wrong timing!

In Gate 2, Ate Daisy pestered me again. I just held my temper. If only I could tell her that 'I don't care.'

After collection, I was forced to lend her P200 again. She's so insistent. It annoys me. She promised me to pay me morrow afternoon. She owes me P500 in all.

Then, I went to my in-laws' house. There, Nanay hands me down the P 200 bill. It would be for Hanna's milk. It's given by Me-Ann.

I was home at past 7.

 

February 17, 2007

I started the morning with sleeping. Then, laundry was done next. Mj and I did intervals in washing.

Eleven, I started selling 'banana con yelo'. It was past twelve when Tin and April made 'buena mano' sales. It was credit. It's okay. In business, credit is inevitable. In fact, I was practicing it.

They stay with me till 2:30. They have noticed how sales went on. It's ‘matumal.’ I was just being patient. Besides, it gives us income, though not that much.

Three when we closed the store. Then, the number I texted a while ago replied. He said, there's a free seminar this 4PM at Chowking, Gate 2 regarding with a business opportunity, which was advertised through poster. Thus, I left immediately.

I was few minutes late; the orientation was already starting when I arrived.

Then after few moments of listening, the seminar I was up to be a 'networking,' just like 'First Quadrant'. It disappoints me. This is not I expect from them. Though, I hear them. It's better than FQ because it offers different, prestigious products. The worst thing is I must pay P7000 to enable me to be a member. No way!

I was approached by Mr. Tony. He was the person I texted. I showed him that I was interested. I asked few questions. But, in reality, I don't have that amount.

I nearly blame myself why I join the seminar. Good thing, there's a snack for the attendees.

Six when I started collecting. Ate Daisy wasn't there. She broke her promise. I texted her: "Ate Daisy, wer r u?" She did not reply. It made me furious. Plus, I have no receipts already.

I was hurrying up in collection, so as in marketing.

At home, I must cook for our viand as usual. I was so tired, but I must.

 

February 18, 2007

As always, waking up early, so that more household chores were to be done, is a must. Though, I wanted to 'sleep-to-sawa', I couldn't practice since I started 'ukay-ukay'. I always believe that morning is the best time to start the day.

It's nearly noon when we open the beverages store. Minutes later, irksome occupied me. It's due to the persons who declined and broke their promises to pay their debts to me.

Past two, rain poured down. Sales was affected. Good thing we have sold few orders, somehow. Thus, we consumed the 'leftovers'.

Four-thirty I left home. I expect for Ate Daisy's absence as what she texted me.

Before going home, I made marketing job. I was so confused in choosing viands. I looked for inexpensive goods, yet nutritious that would help Mj to have breast milk.

Seven-thirty, I went to Tito boy's house to ask him about his forwarded message. It was all about tenancy to Lipin Elizaga's property. Tito Rene was asking of Mama's approval. Then, I thought of Taiwan. He was interested of it. Thus, Mama must accept it.

 

February 19, 2007

We started selling 'banana con yelo' very early at 10:00 AM. It was because Mj and I have decided last night that we're going to my in-laws' house. We will see if Tito Jay's 'padala' has arrived already. And I will also remit the collection to Tito Jun. but before that, April and Tin told me that there was a woman who called Tin's number telling that I have to remit the money. I then started to be irritated. I didn't know. I only knew that it's because of Ate Daisy. She somehow hinders it.

Today is supposed to be the day that Tito Sam would lend me P1500. However, he's not yet home. We left Bautista at 4:45.

Mj and Hanna went to Rancho first. I did collection, then.

Ate Daisy talked to me. She asked me another day to pay her debt. She assured me that she will pay the amount tomorrow. I trusted her once again. But I was decided she would not be permitted to owe again. Never!

It was six-thirty when I arrived at my in-laws' house. Minutes after, Mj and I went to Tito Jun's house. On the way, Mj related to me what Nanay told her. It annoyed me. Imagine, Tito Jun was so furious why I still didn't remit the money. Nanay suggested that I must not use the money. If they only knew...

I am the 'behind' here. Tito Jun should have been paid my wage. Today is the exact one month since he gave me P900. I'm in the right stand. I'm supposed to be the complainant her. Where in the world you could see an employee who receives nothing in one month?

Now if it's a sin to use other's money with an intention to pay it back, I'm sorry... I was just making a source of income so that I could give my 'mag-ina' better lives.

Nanay condemned Hanna's consumption of Lactum 1+. She suggested Alaska. It almost maddens me. I couldn't understand her. Why she always wants this way for Hanna. She must be thankful that I was giving her a proper diet. Besides, Lactum 1+ is not that expensive. And Alaska is not recommended for one year old. Haay! She's unfair! She has favoritism.

Eight, we left Rancho.

In Gate 2, I called Mama. I told her about my employment problem and tenancy to Lipin Elizaga's property. She's not yet decided to accept the offer. I also related her Taiwan's plan of staying in Bautista and Mj's upcoming 'panganganak.' I also implied that we need money.

Tomorrow, we would not sell 'halo-halo' or 'banana con yelo.' It was because I haven't seen 'saba' in Gate 2. It's okay. At least, we would have a rest. Selling summer beverages is so tiring, indeed! Though, I wanted to, I think God lets this to happen.

"Lord God, thank You! I have remitted one week collection. Thank You for Tito Jay has already sent his 'padala' to us. Thank You for everything. Please, provide P2000 for me tomorrow. I must remit another one-week collection morrow. Forgive me for I was 'kicking back' the collection money. Amen."

 

February 20, 2007
Even though we would not sell 'banana con yelo' today I still got up early. It's been my routine. Besides, I have another business to start or to open at the early time of the day.

After all my chores, I texted Tito Rene's number. It was all about his text to Tito Boy asking of Mama's approval or confirmation on Lola Lipin's offer of tenancy. However, it was not replied that early. I have received a message at 2 PM. They asked me if I want the offer. Thus, without further ado and without thinking twice, I said "Cge po." I also told them that I was willing to go home if it's needed. They then assured me to be in touch with me.

I was so glad to this opportunity. I always have been dreaming of this. I wouldn't mind if Mama disagrees. What matters most is our future – my 'mag-iina's future.

I left to Gate 2 early so that I could catch Ate Daisy.

After few minutes, she arrived. Unexpectedly, she asked another day to fully pay her debt to the collection. She only paid me P300. Tomorrow, she must pay me the other P200. Or else?!

When I was home, I was surprised to Taiwan and his 'mag-ina's presence, though he texted me. The house becomes noisier. But it's okay. I just have noticed Mj's face. She doesn't like their presence, I'm sure.

I was supposed to remit tonight, but due to Ate Daisy's broken promise, I haven't.

February 21, 2007

Jenalyn was my first e'-load customer. Unfortunately, my personal balance was unintentionally 'check op' by Taiwan, last night. Thus, I must buy personal load so that I could use my load wallet. Next thing happened; I wanted through Prayer Mountain to look for e-load station.

I was so tired when I got house at 8:35 AM.

Ten, we started selling 'banana con yelo.' We also anticipated for a call of notice from my in-laws. It would mean 'padala.' However, no one called.

God is great! He gave us P225 from 'ukay-ukay.' I could now remit the collection money.

Four-thirty, I left Bautista. I left the money to Nanay.

In Gate 2, I talked to Ate Mirasol about Boardwalk. I told her that I was going home to Bicol. I was then waited to Ate Daisy. Good thing, I need not her P200 to date. However, she must pay me still.

We're not going to sell summer beverages tomorrow, so as Taiwan. I have told him earlier. Alas!

My letter to Mama wasn't sent. She must go home early.

"Thank You, Lord, for the blessings we received today. Bless us again tomorrow. Please, help us in spending the money. Amen!"

 

February 22, 2007

Quarter to seven, I was already awake. After sweeping I started laundry.

Ten, Mj and I were so excited to hear the news from my in-laws about Tito Jay's 'padala.' We have planned last night that we were going to gate 2 but Hanna's and baby's needs. However, at two, after I have 'pasaload,' Meann, who did not reply to my text, we stopped anticipating. But Mj called using my mobile phone load. Alas! It was bad news.

We (I, Tin, and Flor) were gambling all day long. I won more than P10.

Four-thirty, I went to Gate 2.

After collection I did marketing. I market 'banana con yelo' ingredients. Tomorrow, Taiwan would do the selling.

Pas eight, mama unexpectedly arrived. We were all glad to meet her, especially her 'pasalubongs'. Although, my expectation that she's going to hand me money for Mj's 'panganganak,' was not realized, it's okay. What counts was her presence. She, then entrusted me her leftover money. It amounted to P200+.

Mama did not disagree with my acceptance of tenancy. In fact, she was expecting for it already.

 

February 23, 2007

At 9, Tito Boy and I talked about what Lola Bening, and I talked about. He advised me something.

Though we (Mj and I) did not sell 'banana con yelo', we were still occupied. We helped them.

One, Mj dialled their landline's number. She asked if Tito Jay's 'padala' has already arrived. We're so excited and glad to know that it has. Thus, at we left to Gate 2.

Hanna and I went to rancho to get the money. It was already exchanged by them for P39- (less two hundred). Then, I told Nanay that I was planning to go to Bulan as early as possible. They're so glad to hear that news.

Then, Mj and I started to market our babies' need. Finally, we treat Hanna in Jollibee. It was her first time to dine in there. I was so happy about it. I took pictures while she's eating. I know she's glad, too. She enjoyed the first experience.

It was six when we got home.

Night, I texted Tito Jun about 'there in Gate 2.' He told me that I better not to go there so that I would not get involved in the problem. He then asked about the not remitted collection. To make the story short, he announced that the not remitted amount could be used by us. Mj and I were so glad. It's impliedly my salary. P2000+ is enough for me.

Jano and Gie arrived at 9. They have so many 'pasalubongs' for us. Mama told him about my luck. He was so happy about it.

 

February 24, 2007

Taiwan woke me up at 5. He asked me for the money he would pay for the picture he would bring to a developing center. Thus, I have had a hard time to sleep again.

Six-thirty, I got up without even having a hot coffee. I started preparing for my 'tinda.' I sweetened banana and corn.

Nine, I personally paid Tito Sam for P1500. We then talked about tenancy I have won. He advised me, too.

Eleven, we started selling. Three, we quit when it drizzles. It was the second time. It annoys me! Yet, I was so glad that I have earned somehow. Plus, I have had P90 sales from 'ukay-ukay.' Thus, I have listed items to buy in Gate 2.

Quarter to five, I was already in Gate 2. Ate Daisy wasn't there. I miscalled her. She texted me, telling she would pay me tomorrow. But I declined because I did not like the meeting place and time. I started to get irked. She was making it hard for me.

I did marketing, before going home.

When I was home, I got mad because my load wallet hasn't arrived early. Thus, I missed one client.

"Lord God, thank You very much. We're blessed today, though Ate Daisy broke her promises. I'm confident enough that I could make it. I could still hold my temper. Pardon me. Amen!"

 

February 25, 2007

I got up early so that I could start laundry early. But before washing I helped Mama in sweeping the yards' clutters.

Ten, we started selling.

One, my in-laws dropped by. Nanay confirmed to Mj that Tito Jun would give me my salary as collector in two months. It made me so glad. I was so excited to have it. Thus, I've planned to buy Mj a second-hand mobile phone so that we would have a communication when we part ways.

This way. we could help them and at the same time we could have a souvenir from selling 'ukay-ukay.'

It was past three when we stopped selling. We're out of milk, that's why. However, I have had an income somehow.

Five, a couple who talked to me about their business and their proposal came back. They then showed their end-product. It's not that nice. I have no choice but to exchange my 'ukay-ukay' merchandise to their product. Mj, who was at first disagreed because it's too expensive, liked it after I have explained to her that it's better this way. We could help them and at the same time, we could have a souvenir from selling 'ukay-ukay.’

I was excited in Mj's giving birth to our second child. I wanted her to give birth early so that I could go to Bulan early. Frankly, I was more excited in going to Bulan than in her giving birth. It's not that I do not like our second child, it's because I will leave for them. In fact, it's a sacrifice. I will do it for our future. I love my children. I'm leaving for them.

 

February 26, 2007

Though we would not sell 'banana con yelo,' I still woke up early. Mama and I bonded through a kaffe klatsch, she proposed that 'what if she would leave to Bulan first, before me. We have no final decision yet because Mj (still) did not give birth.

I could feel Mj's bitter feelings about my plan or decision of gong to Bulan. She wants to stay long with her and with our children. She's always like that. But I was not condemning her. It's a usual emotion.

The couple, who sells mirror did not come back. Alas! I was so excited to see their product.

I slept early at 9.

 

February 27, 2007

Right after Gie and Jano left I got up to start preparing 'haleyang ube.' It was past 9 when I have done cooking it.

One, we left Bautista. Good thing, Jenny's sister and her fiancé arrived with a vehicle. They were supposed to fetch Jenny and Yoshimi and we were just going to hitch-hike.

It was two when we arrived in Rancho. We brought 'haleya' and 'ginataang halo-halo' for Nanay who were celebrating birthday today.

Her birthday was our secondary goal in visiting them. The primary was the hope of having Tito Jun's promise of salary to me. Unfortunately, Tito Jun postponed it. Alas! Good thing is the celebrant has 'handa.'

Five, we left my in-laws' house.

In Gate 2, we spent for Hanna's and our second child's needs as an additional to the last shopped items.

Seven, we're home. Our mirror was delivered. Mama was keeping my 'ukay-ukay' merchandise. She's looking forward to selling it in Bulan.

"Lord God, please expedite Mj's giving birth. I was so excited--- first, to see my second child; second, to know what my second child's gender; and last, to go home in Bulan. Please, help Mj. Don't make it hard for her. Forgive me for I've sinned. Amen!"

 

February 28, 2007

Seven, I was sweeping at the yards. Eight when I have started laundry.

Today is Mj' pregnancy's due date, which we computed, according to her last menstruation. However, the midwife who last checked her up told her that it was March 3. Haay! I was so excited to see our second child. Tintin guessed it's a boy. I hoped so.

Mama and I secretly talked about Taiwan. Mama condemned his being 'palibre' in the expenses. She pitied me for I always shouldered the expenses in this house. Thus, I told her that was the sole reason why I want to leave early to Bulan. She, then proposed that she wants to leave first.