April 1, 2007
Five-thirty, Mama woke me up. She was already packing her
things. She has decided that we have to leave today. So I did. I, then packed,
organized, kept and prepared the things I must have to.
I was so excited to leave. Mars was texting. I thought she,
too was excited to see me in Bulan. Naughty, huh!
Eight, Mama left to Tandang Sora. She would ask financial
help from Auntie Vangie since we only have P1000. It’s obviously insufficient
for our fares.
At nine, I also left Bautista. I only brought few clothing
as what Mama advised me.
Eleven, Mama texted me. According to her, she wasn’t permitted
by Auntie Vangie. She, then, called through landline. She just obeyed her since
we need financial help. It saddens me. I blamed their maid who was the reason
why Mama was hindered. Auntie Vangie needs Mama to be a temporary cook. Thus, I
accepted the fact that it’s indeed postponed. And, I could not meet Marjs there
anymore since she was scheduled to go here in Manila by April 9.
Nanay was so frustrated. She’s thinking what if we would not
be given by Papay Benson and what if he’s money was already spent to their
needs and wants?
However, I could see Mj’s happiness to our postponement. She
wants me to stay with them even for a short period of time. Yet, she got
frustrated when I told her that I wanted to stay in Bautista. She keeps
bargaining.
Past one, I hitch-hiked with their car through Boso-Boso. Hanna’s
with me.
Two, Hanna and I went down. There, at Auntie Helen’s house,
Auntie Belen was there. She asked me if Mama was going to Bulan. I could see
her envy and indifference. I could see it through her queries. She doesn’t want
Mam to go there. She doesn’t want her to have money from Papay Benson. She’s
indeed greedy. I really couldn’t take it. She deserves my disrespect.
Past three, my in-laws loaded my mag-iina’s stuffs.
While watching TV, Jano and I talked about Auntie Belen. He
felt the same way, too, towards her. Auntie’s angry too because Mama has told
Lola Alice that she’s going to shoo us away from Villa Esperanza. It was
corrected by Auntie Belen. According to her, Mama and her siblings would not be
shooed away but would be shared with a parcel of lot each.
Mj texted me at 9PM saying “Hi, Bee! Gcing p b u? Nkkainis
u, arang ayaw u n kmi mksama..” I have unintentionally erased her message. But
the thought was ‘She needs me by her side.”
April 2, 2007
Before Jano left to work, he hands me down P100. It would be
for food and water. It then made me sleepless. Thus, I spent the cold morning
watching TV.
I was washing my few clothes when MJ texted. She says “Poroy
kggcing lng b ni Hnna nung dmting cla Nnay khapon kc my lagnat c Hnna plagi
suka bka kc nausog pgggaling jan nilagnat. Punta u kc nglalambing c Hnna gs2
karga.”
Thus, I expedite what I was doing..
Nine, I left Bautista. I was not supposed to leave this day
but due to Hanna’s condition, I had to.
I have got in my in-laws’ house at quarter to ten. I
immediately touched Hanna’s forehead. She’s so hot. She’s inactive. I pity her.
I was planning to buy ‘pansit’ for Zildjian’s first month
celebration tomorrow. But I was saving the money for April 8, which is
Josephine Magramo’s daughter’s first birthday celebration. I wanted to attend.
April 3, 2007
I greeted Zildjian a “Happy Birthday!” Wow! I can’t believe it. Now is the exact day when he was born. Days passed so fast. Just like how he grows fast.
After I have decided that I would save P500 for my children when I leave, MJ approached me. She asked if we would prepare for Zildjian’s 1st month birthday. She did not insist. I don’t want to compromise my children’s welfare. Besides, today is not the only day.
Then, I have heard that my in-laws were ‘problemizing’ our lunch. I wanted to help but I did not give any amount.
In the afternoon, I bought mineral water for my children. It’s my first time to buy water here.
Six, I confided to MJ about Norman. She couldn’t believe it. She thought I have never experienced a relationship with gay. But she couldn’t believe that I haven’t had asexual intercourse with him. It’s true. He’s gay but he has self-control.
April 4, 2007
There was nothing thrilling account in my life today. My day-to-day activities here at my in-laws’ house were eating, sleeping, eating, sleeping..
I was just bored waiting for Mama. I wanted to leave Antipolo. I wanted to go to Bulan as early as possible.
April 5, 2007
Today is Maundy Thursday. Me-Ann and Art were here. We’re almost complete here today. I was starting to feel uneasiness.
It’s my second year (consecutive) this day. Last Holy week, I was also here.
Mj was not in good condition. She has headache. She was vomiting and feeling cold. It’s maybe due to sleeplessness. She’s always sleepless since Zildjian was born.
Jen texted me, asking if Mama and I were already in Bulan. It was due to Flor’s text to her. The latter says Mama was there already.
Minutes later, Mama phoned me. She assured our trip on April 7 (Saturday). She, then, told me that she wanted Hanna to go with us. It was due to her dreams that my elder child was being hurt and neglected. I assured her that it was a reverse. I agreed with her proposal. Thus, right after we bade goodbye, I asked Mj if she likes the idea. She blatantly says ‘no’. She couldn’t afford to live with her or without our children on her sides. I understand. For that, I could not do a thing but to respect her.
April 3, 2007
I greeted Zildjian a “Happy Birthday!” Wow! I can’t believe it. Now is the exact day when he was born. Days passed so fast. Just like how he grows fast.
After I have decided that I would save P500 for my children when I leave, MJ approached me. She asked if we would prepare for Zildjian’s 1st month birthday. She did not insist. I don’t want to compromise my children’s welfare. Besides, today is not the only day.
Then, I have heard that my in-laws were ‘problemizing’ our lunch. I wanted to help but I did not give any amount.
In the afternoon, I bought mineral water for my children. It’s my first time to buy water here.
Six, I confided to MJ about Norman. She couldn’t believe it. She thought I have never experienced a relationship with gay. But she couldn’t believe that I haven’t had asexual intercourse with him. It’s true. He’s gay but he has self-control.
April 4, 2007
There was nothing thrilling account in my life today. My day-to-day activities here at my in-laws’ house were eating, sleeping, eating, sleeping..
I was just bored waiting for Mama. I wanted to leave Antipolo. I wanted to go to Bulan as early as possible.
April 5, 2007
Today is Maundy Thursday. Me-Ann and Art were here. We’re almost complete here today. I was starting to feel uneasiness.
It’s my second year (consecutive) this day. Last Holy week, I was also here.
Mj was not in good condition. She has headache. She was vomiting and feeling cold. It’s maybe due to sleeplessness. She’s always sleepless since Zildjian was born.
Jen texted me, asking if Mama and I were already in Bulan. It was due to Flor’s text to her. The latter says Mama was there already.
Minutes later, Mama phoned me. She assured our trip on April 7 (Saturday). She, then, told me that she wanted Hanna to go with us. It was due to her dreams that my elder child was being hurt and neglected. I assured her that it was a reverse. I agreed with her proposal. Thus, right after we bade goodbye, I asked Mj if she likes the idea. She blatantly says ‘no’. She couldn’t afford to live with her or without our children on her sides. I understand. For that, I could not do a thing but to respect her.
April 6, 2007
I never had a tight sleep because of noises made by the
vehicles and passers-by. I’ve experienced this before.
Before lunch, I wrote a letter for Mj. Today is our 39th
mensisary. That’s why. It goes like this:
April
6, 2007
Mary Jane,
Thirty-nine months of togetherness is not
a joke. It is such an achievement for both of us. Thus, let’s cherish this day.
We’ve come this far..
I just wanna say sorry for my
shortcomings..
However, thankful I was for you gave birth
for a health, handsome baby boy, just like how I was grateful when you gave
birth to Hanna Margaret. Without you, I’m not a father of two. Thank you!
Though, I’ve been so very busy this past few days, I couldn’t still forget your
nobility and unconditional love towards our children. Be always a good mother and
a faithful partner, though I couldn’t promise you the same.
Since, I’m leaving tomorrow we’ll be
separated by distance for a temporal time. But don’t mind it much. It will be
our chance to have a happy future. Put in mind that I’m leaving not to escape
but to seek a better life for all of us. A month or couple of months of
separation is not a hindrance. It will actually strengthen your love and care
for me.
Take care. Take care of our children.
Tsup!
F******
I pity Hanna for she becomes thinner. Alaska does not help.
She just loses her appetite. Thus, I promised Mj that I will send money
immediately when I got there. Mj asked how. I said I will borrow P500 from my
friend, Glenn Calampiano.
I just hoped the amount I am going to send will be used in
Hanna’s and Zildjian’s needs. I told her that I want Lactum for Hanna. I would
be mad if she would hear Nanay’s opinion (that Alaska instead of Lactum 1+ for
Hanna). I also would be mad if they would use the money for their consumption.
Mama is such a good person. She’s a wonderful grandmother.
She wants the best for Hanna. I’m sure she will make a way in order that my
children would have proper nourishment. I bet she will be disappointed and be
sad if I relate to her how Hanna was treated her and I visualize to her how she
looks like now. She wasn’t maltreated or what but her poor eating habit was not
given time and priority. Plus, her Ate Nicole I her competitor.
We had a time to talk. I told Mj to focus on Hanna. She
needs to be fed well. She needs proper nourishment. I demand and command her to
fatten Hanna.
I’m not worrying much for Zildjian because she has breast milk
or Mj is breastfeeding him.
This night, I hand P100 sharp to Mj. The P40 left on my
purse would be my fare tomorrow.
April 7, 2007
I was so excited on our trip to Bulan. Thus, early at 6, I
was reorganizing my stuffs. I also spent time watching my kids while they were
sleeping. I’m gonna miss them.
Nine, Mama called. She relayed a bad news. Auntie Vangie was
bargaining our trip today. She was asking for 2 days extension. Thus, I almost
lost my mind. I couldn’t afford to wait anymore. One day stay in my in-laws’ house
seems so long. I couldn’t wait for Monday, so as Mama. So, she would make a
way..
One PM, I did not hear from Mama. I gave up waiting. I thought
we couldn’t leave today. I then accepted the fact by taking a nap. However at
1:30, she called. We’re not postpones ‘pala’.
Without further ado, I left Rancho. I have seen Mj’s
loneliness. She wants me to stay till Monday.
In Cubao, I waited for Mama. It was a 30 minutes waiting.
Then, another waiting happened. We waited for the bus to gear up to our
destination. It was 5 when the bus left the terminal.
I was so glad and excited to go to Bulan.
Mj texted as if she misses me so much and as if I left long
time ago.
Mama and I have had a chance to talk about several things
and issues.
April 8, 2007
I have had a sleepless night on the bus. I was uneasy by all
night sitting, yet it was covered by excitement.
Six, we’re already in Bulan. I was so glad to see my
hometown. In more than a year of absence, the town changed. One of them was
establishing of Jollibee food chain. It excites me. I, then texted it to Mj. They,
too, were glad to know about it.
Hey were startled and surprised to our arrival but I was
more surprised to know that they were not yet paid. Thus, our intention here
would not be satisfied.
Kuya Jape was here. Ate Jennilyn was here, too. Kuya Bambi
was in Negros. He has decided to study at the Bible School.
Mj and her family asked what had happened. I, thus, told the
bad fate we encountered her. Then, she told me about Hanna’s condition. My
daughter was having a diarrhea and has lost her appetite. She always wants to
be cuddled up. I pity her. I blamed Nanay for this, who insisted to change
Hanna’s milk into Alaska.
Condition here is not good. I don’t feel to stay here—for long.
But for now, I have to take it.
Mama and I went to Obrero. Since, we were disappointed by
our expectation, we have to cover it by going there and confirming the tenancy
issue to Lola Bening. It’s also helpful for us so that Sia Family would not
think that our sole intention here was to ask our share.
Six-thirty when we left the house-church. Now we were sure
that we would have the said tenancy. I was so grateful for Lolo Candoy and Lola
Bening who are the ones that recommend us.
Then, we visit Mama’s friend, Cynthia. She is a fruit vendor.
Mama asked a favour from her. She’s asking for help, especially a job.
Then, I visit Irene Carido at Mercury Drugstore. We just
talked awhile. But before this, I have seen Sir Pelingon besides the store. I
introduced him to Mama and vice versa.
Next, I went to Dr. Can’s clinic. There, Glenn and 3 of his
companions were drinking beer. They’re almost drunk. At first, I was hesitant
to come near. Glenn insisted me to join them. I was given two mugs of beer,
which made me a little bit tipsy.
Marjs was texting. She asked what time I would meet her.
After we have done drinking, I meet Marks in front of their
house. I was so brave to do it though I knew it was risky since her husband was
there.
After five minutes of talk, we parted. She did not even let
me kiss her hand. However it gladdens me. At least, I have seen her. She’s
still gorgeous. She still looks like a lady.
She was sending me messages after a while. I didn’t have
load that’s why I could not reply her. But she understands that I was disappointed
by her.
I went back home at 10:30. Mama was waiting for me. She does not
want me to do it frequently.
April 9, 2007
My first 'waking-up' has been hard. I was
not at ease in doing something. We're too many here. I did not know what to do.
I tried to sleep again but it was so noisy..
Past nine, I helped painting the boat,
which will be used today for the first time. It is also my first time in the
field of fishing.
I also helped in some preparations. I
loved what I was doing, in fact. Excitement is what I feel.
Four o'clock in the afternoon is the
scheduled time of boat's departure. I think, it is my childhood dream that
finally has come true. It’s a dream come true, indeed! However, when we’re
about to test, a machine or technical problem arose. My excitement fell. Alas!
Glenn arrived at 2PM. He was sorry for he hasn’t entertained me
last night. We talked for a while then he left.
I was so occupied toady. I wanted to sleep but I couldn’t besides,
it’s so noisy and so hot upstairs.
Six, I asked Aileen if I could borrow P500 from her so that I
could send Mj for Hanna’s amoebiasis treatment. She’s been kind and
understanding. She never disappoints me. Thus, I texted Mj, telling her that
she could receive or claim it tomorrow at JRS.
Then, I had a talk to Melda, my childhood friend. We talk about
having an own house. She also promised to tell her husband about my
joblessness. Her partner is a regular employee of RRS Marketing. He could help
me have a job there. I hoped so. Bad thing is I have left my requirements in
Antipolo.
After dinner, I went to Zone 2. I have got Frenel’s cp number from
her younger brother. It gladdens me. After a long time, I have contacted her
again. She has changed residence. She however works at SM Manila specifically
at GBX Boutique.
Then, I tried to meet Marjs. She declined.
Finally, Glenn and I have had along serious talk about his
heartache, about my family, about my life and about our plan of taking an
education course this school year at KRAMS.
April 10, 2007
I haven’t had an eight-hour sleep. It was 2 AM when I caught
sleep. Then, 5:300 I got up, it’s due to multifarious thoughts such as Hanna’s
amoebiasis, Marjs, studying plan, ‘paglalawod’, etc. They all contributed to my
sleeplessness. Ascorbic acid I have taken before I lie down seemed useless.
Eight, I went to JRS. Unfortunately, it’s closed. Thus, I
was forced to send them through ML ‘Kwarta Padala’ which I found expensive
compared to JRS. But, before I have sent it I inquired at RGCC about ‘methods
study’. They are accepting. Good thing..
There, I have talked with the librarian, the mother of my
ex-classmates. She told me about her sons’ jobs.
I dropped by at Dr. Can’s clinic, afterwards. Glenn wasn’t
there. Thus, I went back home. He texted me later, that we must go back on
April 16. Thus I should have my requirements soon. Good thing is Mj assured me
about it. She’s going to send it to me soon.
She has claimed the money, saying “Rcved ko n. Thnks! Kht nhrpn
me ihr mhgit sn ko hhnpn un? Bnyran ko muna c Nny ng 200. Bnli ko diaprs ska
gtas ng mga bta.” It was sent at 12:02. Then, at 12:10: “K! Ingat u! Pg my pera
u pdla u uli byran ko c Nny msama ata loob e. Me na bhla sa rqrmnts u. Lab u!”
I related it to mama. She was asking, too, why Nanay acted
like that. If they only knew, they must be thankful that I’ve sent immediately
though I have not earned yet.
Taiwan asked if we already have received our share. I
replied the truth.
Then, I text Mj again. I request for prayer. We must be
blessed by God. I also told her about the luck I could get in fishing and if it
would be blessed by Jesus Christ.
I think it was 4:30 when we left the shore. I was so glad. It’s
a dream come true. I didn’t feel fear. I’m not afraid of ocean because it’s not
my first time to travel through boat. I have been I Samar before.
We’re 6 in all. Good thing is Ate Jennilyn have made a way
so that I could come with them in fishing. The standard personnel of a
medium-sized boat is 5. I hoped they were glad to have me. They were, in fact,
quiet but not angry.
I didn’t know where we have gone. All I knew was we’re so
far from the starting point.
After dinner, the action started!
I thought it was easy but the fact is it’s so hard
especially the culminating job of fishing ---the ‘paghihinuong’. It’s indeed
hard! I could not control my hand. I frequently have deranged the fish. I almost
beheaded one pail of ‘lawlaw’ fish.
We have got 5 chests in only one ‘aria’. I thought we’re
going to have another but the leader opted to go home instead. We dropped them
at the fish port.
Before 12 MN, I was on my bed.
If there’s a chance, we take a nap despite of discomfort. We
also grill fish. In short, we’re happy for what we’re doing.
I have had time to sleep since we catch only few fish.
April 15, 2007
After three 'arias', we only got 1 and a half chest of fish. I was so frustrated. I did not expect this.
Mj and I exchange text messages. She then proposed a proposal that I liked too. She wants to buy a mobile phone from the money, Tito Jay would send her for Zj's baptismal.
I watched Pacman-Solis boxing match at 12 noon.
One, I tried to take a nap..
Two-thirty, I was doing a marketing for our 'baon' in the ocean. I partly hate this part due to tremendous sun heat.
Four, we left ashore. I asked for plentiful fish. I told Him, I wanted to send money for my'mag-iina'.
I was annoyed by my co-fishermen's complains and grievances against what I bought. I just took it quietly but my heart wants to sink. I wanted to speak out but I controlled myself. Besides, I committed mistake, really. What I hate was the way they disagree on our viand. Instead of thanking the Lord for what we had, they rather ask for more.
After we eat our dinner, I tried to nap. Good thing is I have fallen asleep. It was past seven when we're awakened by our leader. The real action, then, started!
I'm glad for our luck. Then, I was thinking what the best thing I could do to my share. Mj wants her gold and topaz ring to be re-pawned. I want to pay Aileen first. Whatever! The best thing is we have found the school of fish. we're so lucky tonight.
Frenel, Jenny Altarejos and Irene Dreu want to have a talk
with me through texting. Bad thing is I couldn’t due to my low battery
cellphone.
April 18, 2007
Seven, we're home. I was so sad. We only caught 1.5 chest of fish. It would never fulfill my needs and wants.
Eight, I asked Auntie Emole if Mama was already there. She confirmed it. Then, she told me that tomorrow is her birthday. She invited me to drop by at her house if I have a time. why not?! I said.
I tried to sleep but I was frustrated. Thus, I helped them in cooking.
Eleven, someone texted me using Xtian's number. She used Ate Diyang's name, saying: "Pntwag ako ng na2y n cristian dhil tnx mo. Ano b!'' So, I replied saying I was forced to do so because I'm concerned and she asked me for advice and she's planning to give their baby to someone which I didn't want to happen.
Christian texted back -- "ulol cnu kba fc u k anu b gs2 mong pllabcin". Then, I asked him-- "Nag-aral ka ba?" For that, I hoped she would stop the remorse towards me. I will never retaliate with bad, filthy words.
Then, Dea thanked me for doing that. She confirmed that she was asked by Christian's mother who texted the latter, but she did not tell the truth. She stopped me from dong it. It's over, she said.
When I was about to go to RGCC, Lola Bening's brother came in. I was being searched by Lola Lipin. Thus, without further ado, I went to Obrero. there, I meet the owner I have been ashamed yet I managed myself. I was just set aside because they talk their agenda. At the end of the meeting, they assured me that I would be their 'bantay' with 'suweldo' and not a tenant.
Then, I and Glenn met at RGCC. We inquired about the 18 units. Mr. Pelingon made us understand that there's no 'methods' anymore. PRC releases new curriculum which is giving the professionals who want to have a license to teach by taking up 18 units. However, after you would have passed the LET, you were only given a limited chance to teach in a private school. We were disappointed by this. We both want to teach at a public school. Thus, we went to SLI-KRAMS, where 'methods' is accepted. Unfortunately, it's closed yet.
I dropped by at the shop. Papay Benson gave his bad impressions to the owner. He obviously wants Lolo Aton to win the case.And, he did not permit me to accept their offer.
Quarter to five, we left offshore. I was hoping for a big catch for I wanted to have a day off on April 20. It's Glenn's birthday and on Sunday, the day Divina has scheduled for our 'jamming' with some of our friends.
April 19, 2007
I was so sad for we have no catch..
At 6 AM, we're already ashore. At 6;30, I was starting to take a rest. before I fall asleep I first greeted Auntie Emole a "Happy, happy, happy birthday!" She thanked me three times.
I was planning to go to Polot and have a bonding with my friend, Epr, however I had no enough money to do so. Seeing and bonding with him requires money because he has surely no money, too. Besides, I have to commute, which is the most expensive in all. Alas! Tonight, we will have no 'lawod'. It could have been the right time to bond with him.
Flor texted me. She has learned about the text messages I sent to Christian or his parents. She also reminded me of our debt to Ate Grace. I really have forgotten it already. Good thing, she reminded me of it.
After dinner, I left to meet friends. i first went to Zone 8. Norma wasn't there. I passed by at Marj's house. She was not there, too. Finally, I went on to see Glenn. He's there. We bonded till eleven-thirty. We have talked about many things. We reminisce college days. We bring back yesterdays with our friends and classmates. But the most important thing we agreed upon was our sojourn to his hometown--- Masbate, on May 13. It is a dream come true.
April 20, 2007
My whole day was sent in lying down. I sometimes helped in chores. But most of the time of day, I was napping, despite of heat.
Though I would not come for fishing with them, I was still the one who did marketing and cooking. I also prepared the stuffs they're going to bring.
Past 4, I was also set in going to Glenn's birthday party. Yet, I dilly-dallied because timidity struck me. I was so shy to go there. Five-thirty when I confidently went there. I was forced to to join and drink since they're all drunk. they're only four-- Bing, Nilo, Onick and Padi.
Padi was the most (worst) drunk of all. Onick and Bing talked to me. Bing, as a nephew of Dr. Can, criticized me for I did not recognize him last, last night. I told him why and I apologized. then, I realized that they're good friends,a s what they say.
I tried to fell at home. Thus, I gulped fast as I could. Bing dared me to 'bottom's up', which almost made me throw up.
Glenn hasn't entertained me till I left. I understand.
I dropped by at Glenn's brother's working place-- parlor. He was cutting lady's hair when I saw him. Then, I dropped by at Garilao's house. he entertained me. he knew what I need by giving me a cup of hot espresso.
We have had a nice, long conversation. We exchanged stories, anecdotes and news. I told him that Glenn has a 'tampo' with him. We talked about our love lives, our plan of studying, our classmates such as Happy, Gerry Navarro, etc. I asked him, too, if he could secure me a job at RRS Mktg, where he's working.
On the way home, I looked for Janet Gona's house since April wants to have her number. But I haven't find it. I instead saw Mavic, April's grandmother. I regard her and she told me that her eye couldn't see already. I texted Tintin about it at 11 PM.
Then, near roadside I was called by Nonoy, who was drinking gin with 3 other familiar guys. I stopped by. They are nice to me. I wanted to stay but I'm hungry. So, I left them. I would be back, I said.
I was home at 9:30 PM.
After dinner, I planned to escape but it would be a shame for me if I would pursue. Thus, I preferred to stay and sleep.
While I was lying down, I re-read the text messages of a girl, who tried to fool me. She has told me that she is Jhay, then she corrected it that she's really Jennifer Dela Cruz. After some guessing, she finally confided to me her identity. She's Theresa, according to her. I knew Tere. She's my ex, but her stories were not known to me. The names she was revealing were all blurred. She's accusing me of something I did not.
April 21, 2007
I got up at 8 AM. My head was aching...
Since my textmate intrigues me, I texted Flor. I asked her if she knew the number. Bad thing, she's blackmailing me. She wants me to send her money before she gives it.
She asked also if Mama was here already. According to her Mama left Lucena yesterday. I wasn't worrying. I knew she's fine.
Sierra texted me. She asked why I gave her number to Glenn. She's not mad at me. In fact, she likes it. We had a conversation about courtship. She prefers courtship without bridge.
Four, Sharon texted me. I have learned that Bernadette and Leonisa were in Legazpi. She then proposed a reunion, which was agreed by Leonisa.
Past 4, we left the shore. I prayed to God.
Past nine, the real action began. It's God's blessing..
Good thing, about Kuya Bambi's presence, our leader's attention, criticism and hate were diverted to him. He's now the center of fun and laughter. I pity him, in fact.
April 22, 2007
Four AM, we were still 'denetting' so many fish. We're contacting our rescue but it could not find us. Thus, we decided to load the net with trapped fish which was about 10 chests. It would be turned into trash. Alas! I only we have got plenty of ice, cellophane and chests. We only save 22 chests. Not bad! But we turn some fish into 'reject'.
On the shore, blames bombarded to everyone of us. My group was blaming Adrian. He and his group were also blaming us for our text messages were unclear. Whatever! I only knew that I must not be blamed though I was the one who holds the cellphone. I was just texting what they were saying.
It was 7:30 AM when I got refreshed. I started to catch sleep.
Nine, I was awakened by Mj's text. Thus, I got up and text her. Later I was texting to Flor about my papers. My in-laws were going to Boso-Boso today. I haven't told her yet about our good luck that we got this fishing day.
Then, I texted Joelynda, a woman whom I pawned Mj's gold-topaz ring for P500 more than a year ago now. Her reply made me nervous. It seems that it was lost. I also suspected her that she wants and likes it so much. She doesn't want it to be redeemed.
My income was P900+. I paid P500 to Aileen.
Mj apologized after I have explained clearly to her about everything from hardships of fishing to a very small detail of my life here.I then requested for prayer from her. She however told me her desire of having a house were we could dwell peacefully and happily. So do I. She then assured me of help. She will ask financial assistance from Tito Jay.
I haven't had an eight-hour sleep. I could hardly catch one.
I was the one who cooked the 'pata'. I wanted to blame myself for it was so 'makunat'. I have boiled it in along time yet it's terrible. It almost drowns me to shame.
Eleven, after 'aria', we got few fishes, which is good for viand.
April
11, 2007
I
have had only few hours of sleep. My headache, however did not make me feel fall
asleep. It’s so noisy here.
For
the first time, I have earned from fishing. I was so glad to receive my P186
share. I wold share it so that I could pay Aileen.
One,
Mama and I went to Agrarian Reform office since we were told by Lola Bening’s
brother, as requested by Bobby, relative of Ruth Elizaga. We’re nervous. We both
know that today is the hearing of Lolo Aton and the owner.
When
we got there, Lolo Aton and Pay Bading were there. Mama had a talk with them
about everything. We then waited fr Bobby but he wasn’t there. I’ve just got
angry.
Past
two, I was preparing for ‘paglawod’. It’s the first time ‘Eking’, the big boat
would be offshore. I was so excited.
Past
four, ‘Eking’ left Zone 7. We’re nine
fishermen in all. The boat could accommodate more than 9. It’s so big. In fact,
we have more than 20 chests. Thus, I prayed to god for a prosperous fishing. I expected
for more than 10 chests of fish.
My
co-fishermen today were not the fishermen yesterday. Yet, I felt ease/. Besides,
nothing to worry about. Some of them knew me.
Six,
we’re already resting. We’re waiting for the ‘hamag’.
Nine-thirty,
we have ad a second ‘aria’, after we have got a 1 and a half chests of fish. I
could feel frustration yet I was still hoping.
While
waiting and after we dine for a second time, took a rest and sleep. I then felt
the rumored coldness. It’s indeed true. The cold is terrible. Though I have
jacket on me, I could still fell it. Yet, I have fallen asleep, despite of
waves, cold and dizzy-feeling.
Two,
we’re disappointed be second ‘aria’ we did not even fill a chest. Thus, we rush
to fish port and sold it—the 1 and a half chests of ‘tamban’ fish. I then asked
God ‘why’. Later I apologized and thanked Him.
Three.
I was on my ‘higaan’.
Next thing happened is the real action in fishing. Despite
of nausea, headache and backache I was feeling, I did my part still. I was
frequently corrected by our leader, Kuya Dan, but I accepted it all with smile
in my face, though I wanted to grimace.
April 12, 2007
I tried to sleep after having our breakfast but I was just
disappointed. Thus, I rose up and acted like a well-slept one.
Mama related to me how Papay Benson disagreed on Mama’s
problem but it’s a matter of life and death. Thus, Papay Benson confirmed that
he would redeem our pawned property so that we would not accept the tenancy.
I just let God to do the decision-making. I will just look,
see and wait.
Since we got only 1 1/2 chest of fish, we would have no
sharing at all. It’s okay! Life is a trial and error process.
Mj texted me telling she has a bad feeling about why I did
not reply from her text messages. After I explained that I couldn’t because it’s
prohibited in the ocean especially when we are in action, she apologized. She’s
jealous that I was just using my load to other texters. She’s absolutely right.
But, I was replying to her if I really could..
Four, we left ashore. I prayed and asked for plentiful of
fish.
After we have got 5 chests of fish, we do ‘aria’ again. When
doing it, we all know that it would be our luck because we have seen the ‘hamag’.
Nine, we were all very happy to see our catches.
April 13, 2007
It was past 1:30 when we finished ‘fishing actions’. We got
9.5 chests in all. It gladdens me. Satisfied I was!
Two when I got home. I still was feeling the same.
Six, I was awakened by Mama. She directed me to do a thing
and she declared that we are going to redeem our property in Polot today. Papay
Benson has given her. His promise was now a realization.
Before ten, we’re already in Polot. We we’re seen by our ‘kabarangay’.
But, no one asked why we’re there. We stationed first at Papay Bading’s house. I
brought dough nuts for them. Jason wasn’t there. I did not ask his where-about.
I was texting to Mj and Jen. It was eleven when we moved to the next station—at
Lolo Aton’s residence. They talked about the problem in Agrarian Reform. I just
insist to leave because I was already hungry.
Past twelve, I went to Epr. He wasn’t there according to his
Uncle. He was in Legazpi, applying for a job.
Before I left Polot, I went to Auntie Leny’s abode. I just
show off myself to them.
That afternoon, Mj told me that Tito Jay will shoulder Zj’s
christening. She confirmed from me if I could go there on election day. However,
she wasn’t sure when will Tito Jay send money.
One, I was there, tired and sleepy.
Two, I did marketing. I was assigned to do it. It was one of
my few jobs I could only do in our fishing group.
Past four, we left ashore.
I was thinking for so many things such as how could we
rebuilt our abandoned house since Papay Benson gave P25K only, which is enough
to redeem our property: the possibility that I couldn’t join Zj’s baptismal:
and ways on how I could meet and have jamming with my friends.
Fishing is indeed a tough job or work. It needs know-how,
patience and dedication. I maybe don’t have know-how yet I am dedicated and
patient.
Now, I could play a game with my company. I’m now at ease
with them. I also learn how few things and some fishing terminologies. Plus, my
body starts to adapt the new surroundings. In fact, it needs a muscle. Good thing
I could lift some of bat’s equipment.
I the ocean, I have been the center of our leader’s eyes. He
often corrects and teaches me. It sometimes annoys me. But, I do understand him.
I have to learn from them, anyway.
April 14, 2007
It was 5 Am when I got home. I was so tired and sleepy yet I
was thankful for God heard my prayer. He gave us 6 and ¾ chests of fish.
Ten, I got up… Then, I asked Mama if I would go to Antipolo
City on May election and on Zj’s baptismal. She and Aileen suggest I would
rather stay here. I was earning. I might lose the chance if I do.. Thus, I
texted Mj. She was disappointed. Finally she gave up saying “Bahala na.”
One PM, Epr came in. I pity him. He’s thinner than the last
time I saw him. I then entertained him by telling my life to him and by asking
him some questions about him. I did not have anything to offer him but a used
Nike black cap. He partly liked it. He told me that for one year he never go
out to jam with his friends. He only stayed at home. I think the reason was my
absence.
Four, after I have given him the best accommodation, I
could, he was forced to leave. I indeed want to bond with him but I might not
be. I have to prioritize fishing. Thus, I was inviting him to come with me on
April 20. I was invited by Glenn to his birthday. He did not promise yet he did
not decline strongly.
Five we’re already in the ocean. I took over cooking of
viand, which was commended by our leader.
April 15, 2007
After three 'arias', we only got 1 and a half chest of fish. I was so frustrated. I did not expect this.
Mj and I exchange text messages. She then proposed a proposal that I liked too. She wants to buy a mobile phone from the money, Tito Jay would send her for Zj's baptismal.
I watched Pacman-Solis boxing match at 12 noon.
One, I tried to take a nap..
Two-thirty, I was doing a marketing for our 'baon' in the ocean. I partly hate this part due to tremendous sun heat.
Four, we left ashore. I asked for plentiful fish. I told Him, I wanted to send money for my'mag-iina'.
I was annoyed by my co-fishermen's complains and grievances against what I bought. I just took it quietly but my heart wants to sink. I wanted to speak out but I controlled myself. Besides, I committed mistake, really. What I hate was the way they disagree on our viand. Instead of thanking the Lord for what we had, they rather ask for more.
After we eat our dinner, I tried to nap. Good thing is I have fallen asleep. It was past seven when we're awakened by our leader. The real action, then, started!
I'm glad for our luck. Then, I was thinking what the best thing I could do to my share. Mj wants her gold and topaz ring to be re-pawned. I want to pay Aileen first. Whatever! The best thing is we have found the school of fish. we're so lucky tonight.
April 16, 2007
Twelve midnight, we’re done ‘de-netting’ the fishes. We got
19. 5 chests. It was the luckiest fishing we encountered.
One-thirty, I was home. I then took my vitamins first before
I sleep. It would help me catch a sleep.
My body smells fishy. It gets scales. And, I get scratches,
cuts and wounds. These are the disadvantages of fishing. Never mind. What
matter most is the perk of it.
Due to noise pollution, I was forced to get up. Then, I
talked to Mama. We’ve talked about few things such as Atty. Diokno’s bad deeds;
battle against Aileen and Ate Jennilyn and many more. She advised me not to
meddle on them. I must be two-sided.
Mj was so anxious to go here in Bulan. She keeps on asking
about our abandoned house. She could ask Tito Jay for financial help but the
latter could only shoulder the water and electric installation.
My income from the last night’s fishing is P6oo. Mj asked if
I could redeem her ring, last night. So I gave her options for her: ring or
cash. She chose cash. So I did. After lunch I send the P500.
I apologized to Aileen for I could not pay yet my P500 debt
to her. She understands.
Mama went to Polot. She was going to make sure if the
redemption would be realized to date. I just pity her. She’s leaving tomorrow
with P540 only in her pocket. She’s actually not sure where she will drop by---
in Lucena or in Tandang Sora or in Sauyo.
Four, our boat went off shore.
Five, Mj texted me. She said she could not take my children
to a studio because she bought viand and she would bring Zj to a clinic
tomorrow for a vaccination. It disappoints me. My simple request seems so hard
to realize. I understand that she has to share but she must understand my
situation. I’m sick of remembering my kids.
In the ocean, I noticed that I was now immunized to waves
and ‘hilo’, I could now sleep well.
April 17, 2007
As of one AM, we’re on the shore. Nonoy cooked ‘adobong
lawlaw’. We then had a midnight snack.
One-thirty, Kuya Tantan and Papay Benson were waiting for us
to know how much we have caught. Three and a half chest of fish was my casual
reply. Finally, I plunged in my ‘higaan’. My back was aching.
Seven, noises awakened me.
Seven-thirty, I got up and took hot coffee. Afterwards,
upstairs, I replied to April’s text messages. She was asking for favour. She
wants me to get her friend’s number. I promised her.
Then, Marjs texted “Musta?’’ I replied “Hu u?” I just want
to teach her a lesson. If she really wants me, she will never stop.
I texted Auntie Leny and asked her if Mama was leaving home
today. She confirmed it, thus, I wanted to see her at the shop but I could not
because it was so hot. Besides, I don’t have money. I wanted to give her extra
money. Bad thing is I have only earned P90. AS a result, I pity her. It makes
me sad.
Two, Glenn came over. He told me that he would go to RGCC
and he made sure if I really want to enroll. I gave him my word of honor. Though
I couldn’t enroll yet but I’m so willing to pursue my education.
After I have prepared pour ‘baon’, I took a nap, but before that,
I texted Christian, the one who neglected Rodea. I condemned him. He replied
illogically. He tried to, as if he was the loser. Later, her mother meddles.
She took over the texting. So I went on. I sent sarcastic messages which were
not replied properly by them. I just stopped because my mobile became ‘lowbat’.
They’re so lucky!
They never knew it was me who’s texting them.
I sent two of many messages of Xtian’s mother to Tintin’s
mobile. They reply not.
Mj has told me about my children, which gladdens me.
Zildjian becomes bigger than I last saw him. Hanna’s appetite came back. It’s nice
to know that they’re fine and healthy.
In the ocean, my hate towards our leader increases. He’s not
that good leader. I don’t like the way he leads. His approach is always in a
high pitch.
April 18, 2007
Seven, we're home. I was so sad. We only caught 1.5 chest of fish. It would never fulfill my needs and wants.
Eight, I asked Auntie Emole if Mama was already there. She confirmed it. Then, she told me that tomorrow is her birthday. She invited me to drop by at her house if I have a time. why not?! I said.
I tried to sleep but I was frustrated. Thus, I helped them in cooking.
Eleven, someone texted me using Xtian's number. She used Ate Diyang's name, saying: "Pntwag ako ng na2y n cristian dhil tnx mo. Ano b!'' So, I replied saying I was forced to do so because I'm concerned and she asked me for advice and she's planning to give their baby to someone which I didn't want to happen.
Christian texted back -- "ulol cnu kba fc u k anu b gs2 mong pllabcin". Then, I asked him-- "Nag-aral ka ba?" For that, I hoped she would stop the remorse towards me. I will never retaliate with bad, filthy words.
Then, Dea thanked me for doing that. She confirmed that she was asked by Christian's mother who texted the latter, but she did not tell the truth. She stopped me from dong it. It's over, she said.
When I was about to go to RGCC, Lola Bening's brother came in. I was being searched by Lola Lipin. Thus, without further ado, I went to Obrero. there, I meet the owner I have been ashamed yet I managed myself. I was just set aside because they talk their agenda. At the end of the meeting, they assured me that I would be their 'bantay' with 'suweldo' and not a tenant.
Then, I and Glenn met at RGCC. We inquired about the 18 units. Mr. Pelingon made us understand that there's no 'methods' anymore. PRC releases new curriculum which is giving the professionals who want to have a license to teach by taking up 18 units. However, after you would have passed the LET, you were only given a limited chance to teach in a private school. We were disappointed by this. We both want to teach at a public school. Thus, we went to SLI-KRAMS, where 'methods' is accepted. Unfortunately, it's closed yet.
I dropped by at the shop. Papay Benson gave his bad impressions to the owner. He obviously wants Lolo Aton to win the case.And, he did not permit me to accept their offer.
Quarter to five, we left offshore. I was hoping for a big catch for I wanted to have a day off on April 20. It's Glenn's birthday and on Sunday, the day Divina has scheduled for our 'jamming' with some of our friends.
April 19, 2007
I was so sad for we have no catch..
At 6 AM, we're already ashore. At 6;30, I was starting to take a rest. before I fall asleep I first greeted Auntie Emole a "Happy, happy, happy birthday!" She thanked me three times.
I was planning to go to Polot and have a bonding with my friend, Epr, however I had no enough money to do so. Seeing and bonding with him requires money because he has surely no money, too. Besides, I have to commute, which is the most expensive in all. Alas! Tonight, we will have no 'lawod'. It could have been the right time to bond with him.
Flor texted me. She has learned about the text messages I sent to Christian or his parents. She also reminded me of our debt to Ate Grace. I really have forgotten it already. Good thing, she reminded me of it.
After dinner, I left to meet friends. i first went to Zone 8. Norma wasn't there. I passed by at Marj's house. She was not there, too. Finally, I went on to see Glenn. He's there. We bonded till eleven-thirty. We have talked about many things. We reminisce college days. We bring back yesterdays with our friends and classmates. But the most important thing we agreed upon was our sojourn to his hometown--- Masbate, on May 13. It is a dream come true.
April 20, 2007
My whole day was sent in lying down. I sometimes helped in chores. But most of the time of day, I was napping, despite of heat.
Though I would not come for fishing with them, I was still the one who did marketing and cooking. I also prepared the stuffs they're going to bring.
Past 4, I was also set in going to Glenn's birthday party. Yet, I dilly-dallied because timidity struck me. I was so shy to go there. Five-thirty when I confidently went there. I was forced to to join and drink since they're all drunk. they're only four-- Bing, Nilo, Onick and Padi.
Padi was the most (worst) drunk of all. Onick and Bing talked to me. Bing, as a nephew of Dr. Can, criticized me for I did not recognize him last, last night. I told him why and I apologized. then, I realized that they're good friends,a s what they say.
I tried to fell at home. Thus, I gulped fast as I could. Bing dared me to 'bottom's up', which almost made me throw up.
Glenn hasn't entertained me till I left. I understand.
I dropped by at Glenn's brother's working place-- parlor. He was cutting lady's hair when I saw him. Then, I dropped by at Garilao's house. he entertained me. he knew what I need by giving me a cup of hot espresso.
We have had a nice, long conversation. We exchanged stories, anecdotes and news. I told him that Glenn has a 'tampo' with him. We talked about our love lives, our plan of studying, our classmates such as Happy, Gerry Navarro, etc. I asked him, too, if he could secure me a job at RRS Mktg, where he's working.
On the way home, I looked for Janet Gona's house since April wants to have her number. But I haven't find it. I instead saw Mavic, April's grandmother. I regard her and she told me that her eye couldn't see already. I texted Tintin about it at 11 PM.
Then, near roadside I was called by Nonoy, who was drinking gin with 3 other familiar guys. I stopped by. They are nice to me. I wanted to stay but I'm hungry. So, I left them. I would be back, I said.
I was home at 9:30 PM.
After dinner, I planned to escape but it would be a shame for me if I would pursue. Thus, I preferred to stay and sleep.
While I was lying down, I re-read the text messages of a girl, who tried to fool me. She has told me that she is Jhay, then she corrected it that she's really Jennifer Dela Cruz. After some guessing, she finally confided to me her identity. She's Theresa, according to her. I knew Tere. She's my ex, but her stories were not known to me. The names she was revealing were all blurred. She's accusing me of something I did not.
April 21, 2007
I got up at 8 AM. My head was aching...
Since my textmate intrigues me, I texted Flor. I asked her if she knew the number. Bad thing, she's blackmailing me. She wants me to send her money before she gives it.
She asked also if Mama was here already. According to her Mama left Lucena yesterday. I wasn't worrying. I knew she's fine.
Sierra texted me. She asked why I gave her number to Glenn. She's not mad at me. In fact, she likes it. We had a conversation about courtship. She prefers courtship without bridge.
Four, Sharon texted me. I have learned that Bernadette and Leonisa were in Legazpi. She then proposed a reunion, which was agreed by Leonisa.
Past 4, we left the shore. I prayed to God.
Past nine, the real action began. It's God's blessing..
Good thing, about Kuya Bambi's presence, our leader's attention, criticism and hate were diverted to him. He's now the center of fun and laughter. I pity him, in fact.
April 22, 2007
Four AM, we were still 'denetting' so many fish. We're contacting our rescue but it could not find us. Thus, we decided to load the net with trapped fish which was about 10 chests. It would be turned into trash. Alas! I only we have got plenty of ice, cellophane and chests. We only save 22 chests. Not bad! But we turn some fish into 'reject'.
On the shore, blames bombarded to everyone of us. My group was blaming Adrian. He and his group were also blaming us for our text messages were unclear. Whatever! I only knew that I must not be blamed though I was the one who holds the cellphone. I was just texting what they were saying.
It was 7:30 AM when I got refreshed. I started to catch sleep.
Nine, I was awakened by Mj's text. Thus, I got up and text her. Later I was texting to Flor about my papers. My in-laws were going to Boso-Boso today. I haven't told her yet about our good luck that we got this fishing day.
Then, I texted Joelynda, a woman whom I pawned Mj's gold-topaz ring for P500 more than a year ago now. Her reply made me nervous. It seems that it was lost. I also suspected her that she wants and likes it so much. She doesn't want it to be redeemed.
My income was P900+. I paid P500 to Aileen.
Mj apologized after I have explained clearly to her about everything from hardships of fishing to a very small detail of my life here.I then requested for prayer from her. She however told me her desire of having a house were we could dwell peacefully and happily. So do I. She then assured me of help. She will ask financial assistance from Tito Jay.
I haven't had an eight-hour sleep. I could hardly catch one.
I was the one who cooked the 'pata'. I wanted to blame myself for it was so 'makunat'. I have boiled it in along time yet it's terrible. It almost drowns me to shame.
Eleven, after 'aria', we got few fishes, which is good for viand.
April 23, 2007
Four-ten AM, we’re all disappointed to our catch..
This dawn, I have experienced sleeping with a 20x20 plastic
on, under the rain. Huh! Unbelievable! I couldn’t imagine how my long body fits
on the cellophane and I could still breathe. Good thing, it was for a short
period of time..
We’re home at 5:30.
Mj’s text message awakes me. She was asking for ‘padala’
because Hanna has no more milk already. She, I think, gets mad after I told her
that I will not send her yet today.
Next thing happened, we exchange messages. I related to her
what had happened recently under the rain. Here are her messages:
1. “Wla nap era Mean
500 n nga lang budget nya pra hnda ni Akisha. Kla u b ikw lng. Hndi rn nmn me
mkbili pra sa srili ko s mga bata n lhat. Buti nga mlkas n dd c Hnna.”
2. “So ur tired n?
Ganun tlga e.”
3. “Bsta wag u lang
pbyaan slf u. Lam u b na hinhnp k n ni Hanna. Plgi nga ngppkrga sa mga llaki
d2. Sbi Ttay nhhhnp dw ng kalinga ng isng ama.”
4. M crying 2. Me lng
tao d2 s taas swmming mga bta sa baba. Jst tke care. Wag u n lang msyado icpn
mga anak u. we luv u. we mis u so mch!”
Message number 3 makes me cry. I missed them so much. I pity
Hanna. My presence is badly needed. She started missing me. And, it hurts me
much.
I wanted to get rest and have a day-off due to what I was
feeling. However, my mag-iina’s condition pushed me to pursue fishing. They
inspire me to reject the pain, dizziness and other aches.
Quarter to eleven, Frenel and I were texting. Good thing is
today’s her day-off. I questioned her. She confided. I don’t know what was my
emotion was when she told me that she already had a husband. Nevertheless, I
felt gladness when she was starting to open up.
She’s married now with a man whose family is living in
Italy. They have no baby yet because her man left to Italy. They’re planning to
have one when he comes back. The best thing about her is the chance. She would
be petitioned by her partner.
I just felt disappointed because my invitation or proposal
to her has been disregarded. I wanted her to be Zj’s godmother. She seconds the
motion but she’s not sure if she could come to join the party. And, she stops
the communication by not answering my last question --- “Are you sure?”
We left early to the ocean so that we would be the first on
the hot spot. However, we caught one big fish. We then changed location, wherein
we got 4 ½ chests. We were all disappointed yet thankful for we could pay our
vale or expenses last night.
April 24, 2007
Two-five when I totally lie down on my 'higaan'.
Seven-thirty, I woke up. I then texted Mj and told her that I will send her money today. I send a message again, saying: "Malaking gatas na ang bilhin mong gatas para kay Hanna para ang kikitain ko sa susunod ay para sa mga sumusunod: (1) pambayad utang (Ate Grace) (2) pang-JRS ng mga requirements ko (3) at pangpa-picture nina Zj at Hanna." She agreed.
Before one PM, I have gone to Mlhuillier. There, I sent P500 for MJ and my kids. After few hours, Mj texted confirming the receipt of the money transfer. She told me that she bought milk and diapers for two that is good for one week. The we exchange messages, since I gave her load.
She consoled me by saying -- "C Zj tba na tkaw b nmn e. C Hnna mlkas n rn kumain n dumdede pg Lactum. Db dti maitim pototoy ni Zj ngun d n ngblat kc. Pti face nya pmputi n rn d n kau mgkamulha." It gladdens me. To know these inspires me. so. She continues. She says taht Zj could see now. After this, the next message inflames my heart. I was worried to read this-- "Hay naku! D k n ata nya klla. C Hnna hnhnap kn. Minsan ccgaw un sa pnto ng Papa. hay, kelan k kya nmin ulit mkkta? Bka d k n mklala ng mga kids u." It scares me. I don't want this to happen. Thus, I propose that she regularly shows Hanna my picture so that she could not forget my face. then I promised I will call tomorrow.
Then she gladdens me again. to know that Hanna is now a dancing kid is a consolation to my part. that is why she deserves to have Lactum 1+. "Singer dn sya kya lng d mo nmn maintndhan. Gmgwa ngs rling knta. gnun pa rn pro mbigat na c Hnna. Mya't mya dd. hay, buti p mga kids u nmmis mo," she added.
Our conversation lasted till we started the fishing action. It was 5 PM. I have told her that a good luck is obvious tonight.
April 24, 2007
Two-five when I totally lie down on my 'higaan'.
Seven-thirty, I woke up. I then texted Mj and told her that I will send her money today. I send a message again, saying: "Malaking gatas na ang bilhin mong gatas para kay Hanna para ang kikitain ko sa susunod ay para sa mga sumusunod: (1) pambayad utang (Ate Grace) (2) pang-JRS ng mga requirements ko (3) at pangpa-picture nina Zj at Hanna." She agreed.
Before one PM, I have gone to Mlhuillier. There, I sent P500 for MJ and my kids. After few hours, Mj texted confirming the receipt of the money transfer. She told me that she bought milk and diapers for two that is good for one week. The we exchange messages, since I gave her load.
She consoled me by saying -- "C Zj tba na tkaw b nmn e. C Hnna mlkas n rn kumain n dumdede pg Lactum. Db dti maitim pototoy ni Zj ngun d n ngblat kc. Pti face nya pmputi n rn d n kau mgkamulha." It gladdens me. To know these inspires me. so. She continues. She says taht Zj could see now. After this, the next message inflames my heart. I was worried to read this-- "Hay naku! D k n ata nya klla. C Hnna hnhnap kn. Minsan ccgaw un sa pnto ng Papa. hay, kelan k kya nmin ulit mkkta? Bka d k n mklala ng mga kids u." It scares me. I don't want this to happen. Thus, I propose that she regularly shows Hanna my picture so that she could not forget my face. then I promised I will call tomorrow.
Then she gladdens me again. to know that Hanna is now a dancing kid is a consolation to my part. that is why she deserves to have Lactum 1+. "Singer dn sya kya lng d mo nmn maintndhan. Gmgwa ngs rling knta. gnun pa rn pro mbigat na c Hnna. Mya't mya dd. hay, buti p mga kids u nmmis mo," she added.
Our conversation lasted till we started the fishing action. It was 5 PM. I have told her that a good luck is obvious tonight.
Then the real action took place. While working I was planning what to do with my income. I also have thanked God for that blessings. He's so good!
April 25, 2007
One, I have sent my early greetings for Ate Diyang.
Two, we already have delivered the 25 chests of fish. But before that we had to borrow 5 chests from Skye boat. And, our leader has annoyed me. He's so harsh. He's not a good leader.
Three, they're drinking liquor. Eking and Skye's personnel combined.
Thirty minutes later I set myself to sleep. Pas seven when I was awakened by Mj's messages. She's greeting me. Then I told her the news. I just stop our communication after two exchanges of text.
Ten, I've known my income. It disappoints me. Imagine, they bought our fish for P500 per chest. We expect for P700 per chest. Thus, our sharing was affected. I only have earned P595. My plans were postponed. I couldn't send Mj today. Disappointing!
Since I promised, I called Mj and Hanna. I talked to Hanna. I have heard her voice. I could feel in her little voice that she's looking for me. She unfortunately couldn't talk well or response to my questions. Yet, I was so glad to listen on her strange speech.
Mj and I talked about the renovation of our house in Polot. She was going to ask financial assistance from her uncle. Her parents were supportive since they wanted to have a vacation there.
I never had another sleep since I woke up, although I was too sleepy and tired. Good thing is I was gladdened by my 'mag-ina'.Their voices complete me. I was so happy, though I have spent almost P30 for the load.
Thus, I gave Flor an Alltxt20 load. It's my reward for her for she facilitated carriage of my requirements to my in-laws.
Marjs and I were texting. We talked about several topics related to us.
Past five when we left ashore. After dinner I took a nap. It was 11 PM when we all got up to do the 'denetting'. Next thing happened is the real action.
April 26, 2007
It was five when we deliver our catch. I have experienced terrible hardship, never to mention the pain every time our leader talks.
Before I took sleep I was texting with Marjs. We have talked about our past, pending relationship. there are her replies:
1. "Xmpre mbait aq. Kis cge ipunin m nlng."
2. "Cg. xmpre lov kta part k ng lyf q, at d un kaila skn, kuntento kna?"
3. "Medyo.. kc nmiz q rn lhat ng gnwa mo skn.. nd 4 dat ngppaslmat prin aq, dhl my 1ng taong ngmhal at ngphlaga skn s ikli ng pngsmhan ntin."
4."Kaya nga, tnx at renesp2 m aq.. kya nga mhlga krn sn kc pnhlgahan m rin aq."
Eleven, it was when I got up. I have fallen asleep for at least two hours. My headache's gone. Yet I was already decided to have a day off today.
I texted Mj. I told her that we have caught 19 and a half chests of fish. We then exchange text messages. I related all of my activities here and in fishing boat, my grievances towards our insensitive, harsh leader and my plans and feelings.
At 3 PM I received my income of P895. I was so happy to have it. Yet I was sad to think that I couldn't treat my loved ones to Jollibee. I couldn't even treat myself because it's a different feelings when you dine alone. I was thinking if I eat together with Jasleen but I prefer to save the money for my 'mag-iina'.
Though I would not come fishing today, I still took over the marketing job. It is because I want them to think that I'm willing to help in my simplest way. I also did the rice-cooking.
Before my co-fishermen left, I have set my mind not to feel anything negative. My heart would accept the fact if boat Eking would catch a bountiful catch, I would never blame myself because a rest is worth the income I could have. My health is my priority.
Despite of acceptance, I told God to do what is right for this. We all need money for our families. but a bad luck would be, tonight.
Eight-thirty, I was texting Jenny. I regarded her tutoring job. We then talked about being far from our kids. She, too is experiencing the same way, so as Taiwan. we both related our stories to each other. I told her that I cried last, last day. I, in fact forwarded to her the text messages that made me shred. we also tackled favoritism issue and my job's perks.
It was ten when I have fallen asleep. Before that Mj replied from my text message. She said "Good night. I love you, kahit di mo ako love. Tsup tsup tsup galing sa aming tatlo". It makes me laugh.
April 27, 2007
Past seven when I got up. My head was heavy. I wanted to stay on my bed but I thought of my relative and the words they could tell me.
Then I have learned that Eking, the boat where I come fishing, has only caught 3/4 chest. I partly felt happy. I was sad that they could not pay their expenses and it would be paid only if we would have bountiful catch tonight.
Papay Benson thought that I am the lucky charm of the boat. I was so proud for this yet ashamed. According to him, my co-fishermen did not know how to pray.
Thus, tonight, we must have a plenty of catch.
Eleven, my headache was gone. I was okay.
Four-thirty, ten of us left ashore. I wanted to stay home but the boat was starting to move forward.
Seven-thirty, Mj texted me. Her text messages state: (1) "Bc b u? 2mwag c Mama. Nngumsta. tnong nya plans ntn. Nyaya2 rin nya kmi pguwi jan sa Mayo. Kya lng wla pa binyg Zj." (2) Kna A.Vangie. Iwk n dw sya dub. D nga sya mkalis kc wla dw k2long dun." (3) Sbi q Tyo pgwa hauz ung hhngin q pmbintag un n lng pmpgwa. Sma b kmi jan? Knumusta rn nya mga kds. Sbi q lki n zj."
Then, 8:40, Auntie Vangie texted me, telling me to stop worrying because Mama is okay with them. She also told me that I could send a message for her through that number.
We have no catch on our first aria.
April 28, 2007
Our second 'aria' at 4 AM catches only few 'lawlaw'. It doesn't fill one chest. We're all disappointed. Thus, we left the ocean with sadness. It was six AM when I sleep. Two hours later, I got up to have breakfast.
Marjs was texting. She says "Himala di ka nagrerply." She has sent me quote and two wake-up messages but all of them were left unanswered.I have a load. I just want to teach her again a lesson. She always used bad words in her text such as "Iyot mo!' "Gago!", etc. She makes fun of me.
Kuya Dan announces that we're not going to fish tonight. It partly disappoints me. I wanted to earn yet I wanted to rest. But at 1:00 PM, I was forced to help in doing something at the 'kamalig'. I don't want Papay Benson to condemn me for being useless in his house.
Two PM, Frenel texted me. She was requesting for Amy's number. I promised her that I will get Amy's contact number by going at their residence tonight.
Mj did not text me. I knew she has no load. It's okay!
Five to six-forty-five I was taking a nap. Then, at seven, I went to Zone 5 and got Biboy's mobile number as what Ate April requested. good thing is Jennifer was there. Then, I went to Managa-Naga, where Amy and her family are living. It's due to Frenel's request.
There, I have a talk with Amy's sister and cousin. They're too accommodating. Her sister thought I'm not yet committed. She tried to push me to may's heart. But after a while of our conversation, she has learned all about my kids. She also told me that Amy was now working in Laguna. And, she has been there last Holy Week. While, her cousin talked about how good I have been in the class. In fact, she has keeping my test papers, which were kept by Amy.
I've got Amy's contact number when I left. I could see there gladness from my unexpected visit.
Nine, while biking, I have seen a 'buntot-pagi'. It's such a blessings for me. I have been wanting to have one and now I have got it! It's a dream come true.
Past nine, I sent a friendship quote to Epr. minutes later, he replied like this: "Hayup hain ka". It has no punctuation mark at all yet I could see his emotion. He missed me. He wants my visit and he wants a bonding with me. He was in fact, inviting me to visit him tomorrow because he couldn't come here due to financial reason. I did not promise yet I showed how much I wanted to see him. He's all I have, except for Padi Glenn. He's the best person I have gotten.
I started to sleep at ten-thirty.
April 29, 2007
Six-thirty it was when the sunrise or sunlight kissed my face. It made me awake. I immediately took a hot drink and then I went to 'kamalig'. There, I pursue what I was doing since yesterday afternoon. I have to do this for goodness' sake.
Ten, Adrian and I have done it. We would pursue some other task this afternoon. I did not commit because I was planning to visit Polot today.
Days passed, my plan of going to Polot wasn't realized because Ate Jeanilyn wanted e to come on fishing with Adrian, Joe and Ogel tonight. Though my will prefers to see Epr, my body still decides to go fishing.
I asked for Mj's prayer. Though she has no load to reply, I knew she would. However, unfortunately at 9 PM, we haven't had a plentiful catch. After the first 'aria', we did it again.
April 30, 2007
It was five when we're home. we're 'catchless'. I wanted to blame someone.
I haven't had a formal, long rest when Papay Benson announced that boat, Eking would go a far off ocean so that it would have a prosperous catch. I heard the boat's destination is Ternate, Samar. I have been in Ternate and Sampotan, Samar once, years ago. I knew waves would meet us on the way, but I was willing to experience fishing in a far sea, a Visayan ocean.
Eight, I have sent P1000 to Mj. I have texted her the code yet she did not reply. I knew she has no load to do it. So I waited till afternoon.
Nine-thirty, nine of us left ashore. I prayed for God's help, care and guidance so as blessings. On the way, we encountered great waves. Our boat had a hard time in moving forward. I was afraid it would drown. yet, I still managed to hold my breath and keep my fear to myself. Besides, it's not my first time.
It was past 12 when we got to our destination. The place is beautiful. It is an island with a life. Their beach is awesome. They have white sand, blue water and clear sea. I feel like I was a tourist.
We 'aria' at the same usual time. The action has been the same. the only difference is the place.
April 25, 2007
One, I have sent my early greetings for Ate Diyang.
Two, we already have delivered the 25 chests of fish. But before that we had to borrow 5 chests from Skye boat. And, our leader has annoyed me. He's so harsh. He's not a good leader.
Three, they're drinking liquor. Eking and Skye's personnel combined.
Thirty minutes later I set myself to sleep. Pas seven when I was awakened by Mj's messages. She's greeting me. Then I told her the news. I just stop our communication after two exchanges of text.
Ten, I've known my income. It disappoints me. Imagine, they bought our fish for P500 per chest. We expect for P700 per chest. Thus, our sharing was affected. I only have earned P595. My plans were postponed. I couldn't send Mj today. Disappointing!
Since I promised, I called Mj and Hanna. I talked to Hanna. I have heard her voice. I could feel in her little voice that she's looking for me. She unfortunately couldn't talk well or response to my questions. Yet, I was so glad to listen on her strange speech.
Mj and I talked about the renovation of our house in Polot. She was going to ask financial assistance from her uncle. Her parents were supportive since they wanted to have a vacation there.
I never had another sleep since I woke up, although I was too sleepy and tired. Good thing is I was gladdened by my 'mag-ina'.Their voices complete me. I was so happy, though I have spent almost P30 for the load.
Thus, I gave Flor an Alltxt20 load. It's my reward for her for she facilitated carriage of my requirements to my in-laws.
Marjs and I were texting. We talked about several topics related to us.
Past five when we left ashore. After dinner I took a nap. It was 11 PM when we all got up to do the 'denetting'. Next thing happened is the real action.
April 26, 2007
It was five when we deliver our catch. I have experienced terrible hardship, never to mention the pain every time our leader talks.
Before I took sleep I was texting with Marjs. We have talked about our past, pending relationship. there are her replies:
1. "Xmpre mbait aq. Kis cge ipunin m nlng."
2. "Cg. xmpre lov kta part k ng lyf q, at d un kaila skn, kuntento kna?"
3. "Medyo.. kc nmiz q rn lhat ng gnwa mo skn.. nd 4 dat ngppaslmat prin aq, dhl my 1ng taong ngmhal at ngphlaga skn s ikli ng pngsmhan ntin."
4."Kaya nga, tnx at renesp2 m aq.. kya nga mhlga krn sn kc pnhlgahan m rin aq."
Eleven, it was when I got up. I have fallen asleep for at least two hours. My headache's gone. Yet I was already decided to have a day off today.
I texted Mj. I told her that we have caught 19 and a half chests of fish. We then exchange text messages. I related all of my activities here and in fishing boat, my grievances towards our insensitive, harsh leader and my plans and feelings.
At 3 PM I received my income of P895. I was so happy to have it. Yet I was sad to think that I couldn't treat my loved ones to Jollibee. I couldn't even treat myself because it's a different feelings when you dine alone. I was thinking if I eat together with Jasleen but I prefer to save the money for my 'mag-iina'.
Though I would not come fishing today, I still took over the marketing job. It is because I want them to think that I'm willing to help in my simplest way. I also did the rice-cooking.
Before my co-fishermen left, I have set my mind not to feel anything negative. My heart would accept the fact if boat Eking would catch a bountiful catch, I would never blame myself because a rest is worth the income I could have. My health is my priority.
Despite of acceptance, I told God to do what is right for this. We all need money for our families. but a bad luck would be, tonight.
Eight-thirty, I was texting Jenny. I regarded her tutoring job. We then talked about being far from our kids. She, too is experiencing the same way, so as Taiwan. we both related our stories to each other. I told her that I cried last, last day. I, in fact forwarded to her the text messages that made me shred. we also tackled favoritism issue and my job's perks.
It was ten when I have fallen asleep. Before that Mj replied from my text message. She said "Good night. I love you, kahit di mo ako love. Tsup tsup tsup galing sa aming tatlo". It makes me laugh.
April 27, 2007
Past seven when I got up. My head was heavy. I wanted to stay on my bed but I thought of my relative and the words they could tell me.
Then I have learned that Eking, the boat where I come fishing, has only caught 3/4 chest. I partly felt happy. I was sad that they could not pay their expenses and it would be paid only if we would have bountiful catch tonight.
Papay Benson thought that I am the lucky charm of the boat. I was so proud for this yet ashamed. According to him, my co-fishermen did not know how to pray.
Thus, tonight, we must have a plenty of catch.
Eleven, my headache was gone. I was okay.
Four-thirty, ten of us left ashore. I wanted to stay home but the boat was starting to move forward.
Seven-thirty, Mj texted me. Her text messages state: (1) "Bc b u? 2mwag c Mama. Nngumsta. tnong nya plans ntn. Nyaya2 rin nya kmi pguwi jan sa Mayo. Kya lng wla pa binyg Zj." (2) Kna A.Vangie. Iwk n dw sya dub. D nga sya mkalis kc wla dw k2long dun." (3) Sbi q Tyo pgwa hauz ung hhngin q pmbintag un n lng pmpgwa. Sma b kmi jan? Knumusta rn nya mga kds. Sbi q lki n zj."
Then, 8:40, Auntie Vangie texted me, telling me to stop worrying because Mama is okay with them. She also told me that I could send a message for her through that number.
We have no catch on our first aria.
April 28, 2007
Our second 'aria' at 4 AM catches only few 'lawlaw'. It doesn't fill one chest. We're all disappointed. Thus, we left the ocean with sadness. It was six AM when I sleep. Two hours later, I got up to have breakfast.
Marjs was texting. She says "Himala di ka nagrerply." She has sent me quote and two wake-up messages but all of them were left unanswered.I have a load. I just want to teach her again a lesson. She always used bad words in her text such as "Iyot mo!' "Gago!", etc. She makes fun of me.
Kuya Dan announces that we're not going to fish tonight. It partly disappoints me. I wanted to earn yet I wanted to rest. But at 1:00 PM, I was forced to help in doing something at the 'kamalig'. I don't want Papay Benson to condemn me for being useless in his house.
Two PM, Frenel texted me. She was requesting for Amy's number. I promised her that I will get Amy's contact number by going at their residence tonight.
Mj did not text me. I knew she has no load. It's okay!
Five to six-forty-five I was taking a nap. Then, at seven, I went to Zone 5 and got Biboy's mobile number as what Ate April requested. good thing is Jennifer was there. Then, I went to Managa-Naga, where Amy and her family are living. It's due to Frenel's request.
There, I have a talk with Amy's sister and cousin. They're too accommodating. Her sister thought I'm not yet committed. She tried to push me to may's heart. But after a while of our conversation, she has learned all about my kids. She also told me that Amy was now working in Laguna. And, she has been there last Holy Week. While, her cousin talked about how good I have been in the class. In fact, she has keeping my test papers, which were kept by Amy.
I've got Amy's contact number when I left. I could see there gladness from my unexpected visit.
Nine, while biking, I have seen a 'buntot-pagi'. It's such a blessings for me. I have been wanting to have one and now I have got it! It's a dream come true.
Past nine, I sent a friendship quote to Epr. minutes later, he replied like this: "Hayup hain ka". It has no punctuation mark at all yet I could see his emotion. He missed me. He wants my visit and he wants a bonding with me. He was in fact, inviting me to visit him tomorrow because he couldn't come here due to financial reason. I did not promise yet I showed how much I wanted to see him. He's all I have, except for Padi Glenn. He's the best person I have gotten.
I started to sleep at ten-thirty.
April 29, 2007
Six-thirty it was when the sunrise or sunlight kissed my face. It made me awake. I immediately took a hot drink and then I went to 'kamalig'. There, I pursue what I was doing since yesterday afternoon. I have to do this for goodness' sake.
Ten, Adrian and I have done it. We would pursue some other task this afternoon. I did not commit because I was planning to visit Polot today.
Days passed, my plan of going to Polot wasn't realized because Ate Jeanilyn wanted e to come on fishing with Adrian, Joe and Ogel tonight. Though my will prefers to see Epr, my body still decides to go fishing.
I asked for Mj's prayer. Though she has no load to reply, I knew she would. However, unfortunately at 9 PM, we haven't had a plentiful catch. After the first 'aria', we did it again.
April 30, 2007
It was five when we're home. we're 'catchless'. I wanted to blame someone.
I haven't had a formal, long rest when Papay Benson announced that boat, Eking would go a far off ocean so that it would have a prosperous catch. I heard the boat's destination is Ternate, Samar. I have been in Ternate and Sampotan, Samar once, years ago. I knew waves would meet us on the way, but I was willing to experience fishing in a far sea, a Visayan ocean.
Eight, I have sent P1000 to Mj. I have texted her the code yet she did not reply. I knew she has no load to do it. So I waited till afternoon.
Nine-thirty, nine of us left ashore. I prayed for God's help, care and guidance so as blessings. On the way, we encountered great waves. Our boat had a hard time in moving forward. I was afraid it would drown. yet, I still managed to hold my breath and keep my fear to myself. Besides, it's not my first time.
It was past 12 when we got to our destination. The place is beautiful. It is an island with a life. Their beach is awesome. They have white sand, blue water and clear sea. I feel like I was a tourist.
We 'aria' at the same usual time. The action has been the same. the only difference is the place.
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